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Sunday, May 28, 2006
JUSTin from a reader: Bill Maher's closing bit from last Friday night:

Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend--you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the Army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit card's maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't.

I know, I know.There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote. But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes. On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airlines, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: "Take a hint."


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Happy Monaural Day Weekend...


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Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Coming this weekend to Albuquerque...


Kan'Nal



inconvenient truth


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Tuesday, May 23, 2006
One half of the FRESHCHAOS CREW underwent surgery yesterday to excise a ganglion cyst and to remove a Dupuytren's contracture (both on her right hand). Our patient is doing well today but will not be flying her trapeze for awhile...

Debra Landau at the AirDance ArtSpace


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Sunday, May 21, 2006
Hope everyone on the planet can see HBO's 'BAGHDAD ER'. What a sobering film on the strength of our soldiers and what a...sad state of affairs we have go9ng on daily in Iraq. is there no end to it?

Making its way through cyberspace is this note To those all those born between 1930-1980...

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking. As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat. We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank koolade made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING! We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back  when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K. We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms....WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found  them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them! Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of.They actually sided with the law! These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all. If YOU are one of them . . CONGRATULATIONS...Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it ?


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Friday, May 19, 2006
Breaking Winds=> Typhoon Chanchu Chaos !

Bush sez speakez zee anglaish you moronic aliens...GO ALIENS...



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Move-eye Weekenders:
__DAS CODE .
__Ovah da HEDGE !
__Confidentially, ART SCHOOL blows.


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JUSTin... a reader writes about LOOSE BALLS [see below]:A "Loose ball foul" is like on an inbounds or ball in play but NO one has established possession and one guy fouls the other guy for an unfair advantage at trying to gain possession. [Many thanks for this info, Capn' Wikipedia-dude-of-round-balls...Keep those balls tight now, ya hear? I love balls' jokes...too easy. Used to teach at a high school called, The Balls Fool in fact but my memory of those daze runs hazy to partly cloudy, especially this time of the year. The not so merry month of May will always be a TEACHER PTSD time for me I am afraid. Too much CHAOS, too little time. Excitement runs high in those long halls of education during May Day Month.]


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Snewzbriefs:
__ATTACK of the HOBBIT PEOPLE baffles scientists and gnomes alike...
__JUSTin: A new reader writes: "Fresh Chaos". Reminds me of the line from Dorothy Parker... Walking into an awkward situation, she said, "What fresh hell is this?" [Me and Dorothy go way back, Toto !] Here's another one...Upon viewing a ball room full of young and lovely Vassar debutantes, Dorothy Parker said, "If all these lovely young things were laid end to end I wouldn't be a bit surprised."
__COCKFIGHTING still legal in New Mexico and Louisiana where 'Fowl' are not legally 'animals' in Louisianaand the legislature has kept cockfighting legal. In New Mexico, we just love to watch.
__We've been tuning into the NBA finals and would like to know the answer to this query:..What the heckofajobbrownie is a LOOSE BALL FOWL? Er...Foul?
_Weirdest recent TV Ad: Big headed little people running around on a basketball court drinking Gatorade...Where are the Little People rising up in RAGE like the Abominable Albinos who are SO upset over the RED-eyed freaks in DA CODE...Saw a LITTLE PEOPLE KISS act a week or so ago. Controversy arose not from KISS, but rather from LITTLE PEOPLE KISS group numero dos, who were competitors. GO Little People...[Actually, Go anyone who is shorter than I am.]
__In 1980 this week, Mt. St. Helens blew her top.
__SYNTHETIC THC is now produced by several drug companies LEGALLY. Now isn't that innerestin'...POT is illegal but if the drug COMPANIES can produce it chemically into a pill to sell...well...ain't that sweet for the shareholders...!!
__JACK BLACK is BACK in Nacho Libre .
__Hurray for our regional phone company here in the high desert...QWEST...for refusing to give out the telephone number for FRESH CHAOS HQ to the NSA.
__Quote of the Momento: RE: Bush's 5 point super plan for immigration and/or lack thereof..."I don't think he knew that New Mexico was a part of the United States." ... Jon Stewart.
__Old snewz:...Lest we forget...MOTHER'S DAY was created originally by super suffragette, Julia Ward Howe, in 1872 to protest war. Oh yeah...
__Joke of the Momento: [Sent in by an occasional reader in Virginia.]
A Minister asks his congregation, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?
All hold up their hands except one small elderly lady.
"Mrs. Jones? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"
"I don't have any," she replies.
"Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?"
"Ninety-eight."
"Mrs. Jones, would you please tell us all how a ninety-eight year old would not have an enemy?"
The old lady faces the congregation, and says, "I outlived the bitches."


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Thursday, May 18, 2006
Taken together, the complete lyrics to NEIL YOUNG'S Living With War is simply a masterpiece of pure poetry. It is difficult (without buying the cd) to find all of the lyrics to each song in one spot. Even at Neil's Garage, his dot com site, you can click a link to each song only to have the lyrics spill out in a painfully slow banner reading across the page...

WELL...Now you can see, read, giggle with delight, or scream your pompous Patriotic Republican Rage ALL IN ONE SPOT at: Complete LIVING WITH WAR Lyrics by Neil Young. Give it a whirl...SHIFT HAPPENS and it continues to move us forward in a new wave of hope for this rapidly spinning planet...


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Coming THIS WEEKEND to 'burqueville...
One of our 'readers' is becoming a big shot Hollywoody PRODUCER who has been working his buuut-tarskas off getting a film ready about a very remarkable and inspiring musician...Eddie Hinton.


Eddie Hinton



The world's greatest blue-eyed soul singer may have written, produced, arranged or played on one of your favorite records. You may have heard his songs recorded by Aretha Franklin, Dusty Springfield, Percy Sledge or UB40. His guitar is heard on albums by Elvis Presley, Toots Hibbert and the Staples Singers. Or you may have heard him conduct the London Symphony. You may not know Eddie Hinton's name, but you won't forget his music or his story. Producer/Director, Deryle Perryman & Moises A. Gonzalez...

"Dangerous Highway" will be shown at Albuquerque's GUILD CINEMA, Sunday May 21 @ 4:45 p.m. as part of the New Mexico Filmmaker's Showcase...And it's Free! FRESHCHAOS.com salutes Mssrs. Deryle Perryman & Moises A. Gonzalez!!


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Doctor Xxo-oxX: The Israeli doctor says, "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks."
The German doctor says, "That is nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks."
The Russian doctor says, "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks."
Not to be outdone, the American doctor says, "You guys are way behind. Six years ago, we took a man with no brain out ofTexas, put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work.


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Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Another plunging Tao...er, Dow today. Bush speaks out Monday Night and Wall Street falls for two days in a row...nothing to do with immigration though or DUH PRES (?) 'Inflation news' is the key to this fall. According to tabloids, the Market will begin its final descent into Hell on 6/6/6 with the advent of a rise in FOOD PRICES. Not too hard to imagine this with the droughts, floods, and wrath of a recently not so Republican God or gods.

April in the USA was the warmest month since records first kept in 1895. That's a lot of data to be placing the highest E-V-E-R for. Glad global warming not a factor...
Last weekend with music by the incredible MERMEN, things were gnarley Dude on the West Coast for the Mavericks Surfing Competition on GIGANTO waves. The Mermen are a hot tamale surf rock band. They often pass through the high desert to dry out. We, Fresh Chaos HQ folks, are big fans. Congrats to them for this big TV score.

For more fresh chaos, check in occasionally at this hilarious (scary but funny) website called CROOKS & LIARS .

JUSTin readers write:__Catching up on FreshChaos ... "Spies Who Shag Us" is one of the scariest articles I've ever read. Certainly takes my mind off worrying about this and that and redirects it to downright fear of my wunnerful gov'ment!...Transcript of Al Gore skit totally hilarious! Skipper looks so amazing handsome ... looks great in Hawaiian shirts!
__All Hail the Skipper!  I didn't realize that you all brought him home on Moms' Day.  That was a stylin' photo of him on FC, complete with the Islands shirt. 


British Prime Meatman, TONY BLAIR will step down in 2007. I was a wonderin' how the Brit was farin' as Bush's closest ally. Not too well apparently. After stating that he would serve his full third term through 2009, he has now officially OPTED OUT and Downsized to '07. God save the Queen's man.



It's already old news, but if you were asleep in your fall out shelter, THREE WOMEN HAVE BEEN KILLED BY ALLIGATORS in JEB'S fine state pof Floreedah. GO GATORS. This tasty-tragedy-times-three doesn't bode well for the coming Hurricane Season=> starts in 14 Days...Aaahhh!

This Sunday don't miss the REALITY OF WAR as seen on HBO's documentary BAGDHAD ER...Hope the President and his hawks take in the true joys and ramifications of this war that have been so glossed over in this clean and patriotic fight for freedom and democracy in a land that didn't ask for it. Too much loss of life and limb(s) for so very little...Do YOU feel better off today than you were that week we all watched the shocking aweful electrifying bombing of Bagdhad??? That was certainly one night of very EXPENSIVE (and life-changing-for-all-of-us-and-for-our-children's-children & we don't have to live or go there even), FIREWORKS display.

Fresh Chaos quote of the momento: Stephen Colbert rings in with : "When I think about the truth, I touch myself."


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Monday, May 15, 2006
Fresh Chaos Potpourri:
__I got a catalogue in the mail for 'Teacher Ideas' last week...Well, here's an idea for teachers, QUIT...This story sent in by a reader about a Boston College teacher/Professor, Steve Almond, demonstrates. And why did he quit this week... Just pass the Condoleeza-Rice-o-Rummy .
__On FRONTLINE Tuesday, May 16th:"Can You Afford to Retire?" The boomer generation is headed for a shock...(60 minutes), at 9 p.m. on PBS (check local listings)...
__THE SPIES WHO SHAG US .

__Two Weeks in a row, SNL has ROCKED ON, once again supporting my recent optimism that the WORLD HAS SHIFTED to at least the possibilites for 'something BETTER', despite currently being in such poor shape thanks to you know who and his cronies...
Sent in by a reader ,The following is a transcript from "PRESIDENT" AL GORE'S address to the
nation on Saturday Night Live...

Good evening, my fellow Americans. In 2000 when you overwhelmingly made the decision to elect me as your 43rd president, I knew the road ahead would be difficult. We have accomplished so much yet
challenges lie ahead.

In the last 6 years we have been able to stop global warming. No one could have predicted the negative results of this. Glaciers that once were melting are now on the attack. As you know, these renegade glaciers have already captured parts of upper Michigan and northern Maine, but I assure you: we will not let the
glaciers win.

Right now, in the 2nd week of May 2006, we are facing perhaps the worst gas crisis in history. We have way too much gasoline. Gas is down to $0.19 a gallon and the oil companies are hurting. I know that I am partly to blame by insisting that cars run on trash. I am therefore proposing a federal bailout to our oil companies because...hey if it were the other way around, you know the oil companies would
help us.

On a positive note, we worked hard to save Welfare, fix Social Security and of course provide the free universal health care we all enjoy today. But all this came at a high cost. As I speak, the gigantic national
budget surplus is down to a perilously low $11 trillion dollars. And don't get any ideas. That money is staying in the very successful lockbox. We're not touching it. Of course, we could give economic aid to China, or lend money to the Saudis... again.

But right now we're already so loved by everyone in the world that American tourists can't even go over to Europe anymore... without getting hugged. There are some of you that want to spend our money on some made-up war.To you I say: what part of "lockbox" don't you understand?

What if there's a hurricane or a tornado? Unlikely I know because of the Anti-Hurricane and Tornado Machine I was instrumental in helping to develop. But... what if? What if the scientists are right and one of those giant glaciers hits Boston? That's why we have the lockbox!

As for immigration, solving that came at a heavy cost, and I personally regret the loss of California. However, the new Mexifornian economy is strong and el President Schwarznegger is doing a great job.There have been some setbacks. Unfortunately, the confirmation process for Supreme Court Justice Michael Moore was bitter and devisive. However, I could not be more proud of how the House and Senate pulled together to
confirm the nomination of Chief Justice George Clooney.

Baseball, our national passtime, still lies under the shadow of steroid accusations. But I have faith in baseball commissioner George W. Bush when he says, "We will find the steroid users if we have to tap every phone in America!"

In 2001 when I came into office, our national security was the most important issue. The threat of terrorism was real. Who knew that six years later, Afghanistan would be the most popular Spring Break destination? Or that Six Flags Tehran is the fastest growing amusement park in the Middle East?

And the scariest thing we Americans have to fear is ... Live From New York, it's Saturday Night!


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Saturday, May 13, 2006
Thirteen years ago, this Mother's Day weekend, we brought our first Schipperke home. We named him, SKIPPER. He is still Skipper Scampering about today with his pals, Air Jordan and Miss Melanie.

Here's a shot of The Skipper on one of his birthdays...

schipperke


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Thousands FLEE belching VOLCANO . Happy Mother's Day, Indonesia. Mother Earth is peeved. Mt. Hood or Mt. Rainier could blow tomorrow, you know, Joe...

JUSTin: our readers write:
__Ben Franklin: Master Quote Meister .
__I know Neil is looking for a leader, mentioning Barack Obama in one of his new songs.  But Barack may be a bit too young to assume such a large leadership mantle. Here's one who's a "fresh face", and is  a little older than the Senator from Illinois.  "Experienced Freshness" is his campaign motto. (Actually, "How hard can it be?" seems to be his motto.) The campaign to Take Back America begins in Texas with Kinky Friedman for Governor!  Stay tuned...

{{{ RE: NEIL YOUNG>>>[from: Neil Young gives it away for free. ]
On "Looking for a Leader," NEIL suggests, "Maybe it's a woman/Or a black man after all," and then name-checks Barack Obama. Young met the junior senator from Illinois at Farm Aid this year. "A good feeling," Young says when asked about what he took away from his conversation with Obama. "But I didn't talk with him for long. The band was rehearsing 'Southern Man' with the Fisk Jubilee singers and Wayne Jackson, of the Memphis Horns. He [Obama] wanted to hear that. I did not get a good chance to feel him out about his views, so I can not give you any real feedback other than that." Young is clear on one thing though. "We need a new leader," he says. "One we feel has been fairly elected and represents the wishes of the people instead of dividing the people. }}}

__'YES MEN' PULL HALLIBURTON HOAX::>Good to see the Yes Men back in action!...Here are the survival suits the Yes Men fixed up as part of their gag.
__Lagomorphs, bunnies, rabbits...Maternal or Not Maternal ? You BE the DECIDER.






  


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Friday, May 12, 2006
I bought the NEW (improved?) NEIL YOUNG today. One song that is particularly amazing is Shock and Awe...
Here be the lyrics: 'copy paste' and mail to your Aunties and Unclies...

Shock And Awe

Back in the days of shock and awe
We came to liberate them all
History was the cruel judge of overconfidence
Back in the days of shock and awe

Back in the days of "mission accomplished"
Our chief was landing on the deck
The sun was setting on a golden photo op
Back in the days of "mission accomplished"

Thousands of bodies in the ground
Brought home in boxes to a trumpet's sound
No one sees them coming home that way
Thousands buried in the ground

Thousands of children scarred for life
Millions of tears for a soldier's wife
Both sides are losing now
Heaven takes them in
Thousands of children scarred for life

We had a chance to change our mind
But somehow wisdom was hard to find
We went with what we knew and now we can't go back
But we had a chance to change our mind.

[ Neil Young, from the album "Living With War", 2006 ]


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Two just-sent-in-by-readers HotLinks:
__In poetry-loving Yemen, tribal bard takes on Al Qaeda .

__DIE BOLDly voting machinery is again in the snewz for being unreliably RIGHT sided.


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bird flu in Florida
Flamingo Flu Foils Florida


Nigerian TV reports up to 200 people are feared dead in an oil pipeline blast. You thought gas prices were high THIS week, wait until next week...


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Thursday, May 11, 2006
Dow Tumbles!

JUSTin: our readers write:>
__The latest in performance art apparently...
__As usual, Molly hits the bullseye in .her article .
__Rehabilitation of and by and for the right wing .
__Here's the complete text of the PRESIDENT OF IRAN'S LETTER TO BUSH .


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Inconvenient Truths
Albuquerque's Blue Dragon Coffee House scores big in the UNSATISFACTORY section of today's paper which tracks how local restaurants score in the gross and disgusting category...Blue Dragon is the site of many Literary Arts Events in the high desert. There's certainly a rich, steamy, and fertile compost of p-o-e-m-s in this write up from the City Sanitation authorities: "Cockroach infestation" ...third repeat...four dead in Ohio and on back floor with a glue board containing 20 plus cock-a-roaches...During the inspection, one LIVE roach was seen crawling on the backwall NAKED...Potential harborage for insects found outside... AAAAAHHHHHH...Next up, the Cockroach Poet will recite his tome entitled, Cockroach Invasion: '06...Stay tuned.

PUTIN FIRES BACK at DICKHEAD CHENEY and all of us, USA 'merikans...calling Washington a wolf who eats without listening. "Comrade wolf knows whom to eat, he eats without listening, and he's clearly not going to listen to anyone"...Clearly our idiot non-savant President has made a sham of our entire Nation under God while wearing the Emperor's naked buffoonery for clothing. We are no longer RESPECTED nor FEARED. Not even by our old enema, Russia.

RE: AKEELAH & THE BEE...LURN to spell the word, AQUILA. It is Latin for EAGLE. Hey while you're at it, Akeelah fans, visit: AQUILA ARTS .

Earlier this week, the David Letterman Show showed the 'first tv sighting' of the pregnant again BritKnee Spearhead; more importantly though, on the same show, RUPERT GEE was wearing a KANSAS JAYHAWK'S tee shirt!! GO OZland...Which reminds me that the other day here in Albuquerque, I saw a bumpersticker reading, "BUSH IS A NATURAL DISASTER" on the back of a car (good spot for bumperstickers). The car had KANSAS-IAN plates. I pulled alongside the young woman driver and said, You don't like Bush and you're from KANSAS? She replied, There are a few of us. Here, here. Bravo young wo-man from Kansas!!

Nuevo Meheeco updates: Lynne Anderson was recently busted for DWI in Espanola, New Mexico home to the Sikh headquarters. When asked once why the Sikhs would be HQ'd there, their leader replied, If you can make a living in Espanola, you can make a living anywhere....It's a miracle..... Kiplinger's latest has Albuquerque as the Number One place in the USA to start a business. Los Alamos tops a recent list for ' Millionaire Density '....Los Alamos last week passed it's third anniversary for the great 'Controlled Burn' (not!) that nearly blew up the world's atomic bombs and laboratory secrets....Albuquerque gets a BOWL GAME: Next December 23rd, ABQ will host the WAC-Western Athletic Conference vs. the MWC-Mountain West Conference game at the UNM Stadium...Highest ticket price is $30. No wonder business's ought to move here....A MINUTE MEN rally in Abq. had the head of it all, Jim Gilchrist, complaining about our Mayor: If LA RAZA had held a gathering, there'd have been a microphone provided by the City, stated Gilchrist. I guess the Mayor was busy shooting illegal aliens on the internet's latest Shoot the Alien, Gay, or Jew game.

Other updates: 400 dolphins died in Zanzibar presumably from U.S.NAVY sonar....Louis Rukeyeser died at the age of only 73 proving once again that Money can't buy you love nor longevity....63 year old Patricia RASHbrooke of England is pregnant....RANA COMPOTRIX (named for the TRIX bunny?) and 7 other new species of FROGS have been discovered in Laos....Denise Richards now hates Heather Locklear....BEST TV show to most likely be dis-continued: THIEF....Best advertisement for upcoming TV show: Dennis Leary in flames for Rescue Me....Tiger Woods father is still dead.

BAGHDAD ER is coming soon to HBO. Now here's a true REALITY SHOW that may open some eyes to the horrors of what is happening minute by minute to our U.S. men and women in Iraq and even moreso to the citizenry of Iraq. Will this change our mind about this quick, sanitary, and bloodlessly shocking aweful war? Probably not.

In other snewz:At the current rate of life, love, and the pursuit of the 'Merican Dream, MEDICARE runs dry in the year 2018. Social Insecurity runs dry in the year 2040. Just thought you should know.... 25 years ago FREQUENT FRIER miles got their start. They are duee to run dry next week.... 75 years ago, the Empire State building was completed only to be wee weed on by giant apes at least three times now (ha ha).

CHASING GHOSTS by Paul Reikoff is now out of the closet...It is one of the first of undoubtedly many books written by a returning U.S. Iraq War II veteran. The book paints a pretty grim picture of the whole scenario there and at home for our men and women in arms (often without arms actually).

Fresh Chaos quotage of the momento: Marijuana has no lobbying value...Drug companies are the pushers...__Bill Maher

Thank you sir, may I have Another:Bush's father had a VEEP who couldn't spell POTATO. Bush has a VEEP who shot a guy. DUH PRES is less than 4 points away from beating out his dad on the unpopular scale.

BE A DECIDER. No, YOU be a decider; no, YOU. OK.


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Tuesday, May 09, 2006

RollingStone's 1000th Cover




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__CONDO-Sleesa Rice Krispie blows off letter from Iran.
__Not a good weekend for the stars...David Blaine damn nearly drowns on the national boob tube and Keith Richards has to have his head opened to drain concussive fluids from his latest fall (from a Figi tree). Kind of like the May Pole of Figi?
__A new study is out that shows PROOF POSITIVE that the brains of lesbians react differently to sex hormones than those of heterosexual women. Just GOOGLE LESBIAN BRAINS for more. The research team is stationed at the Stockholm BRAIN Institute. No, really.
__WALL of the FART wrecks towns ...?__Medium-sized just isn't enough for the History Channel which will soon show the grim...MEGA DISASTERS !!


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Monday, May 08, 2006
According to Reuters:UK, recently, the President of the United States of America revealed to a German newspaper that for him personally, his best moment in more than five years in office was

bush big perch
catching a big perch
.


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Some ROCK STARS always really wanted to be DJ's apparently. For some time now, Tom Petty has had his own show on satellite radio; and now, the master himself, Uncle Bob Dylan has his own show...Read about the master mumbler now on XM radio. he has a very interesting show musically, and Uncle Bob doesn't seem to mumble as much as when he sings. If you are a DirecTv subscrib, you can catch the tunes or lack thereof on Channel 840.
  
__ PBS' FRONTLINE takes us this Week to see: "Hamas, Chopin, and South Africa" (60 minutes) on Tuesday, May 9, at 9 p.m. Also, there's to be a Live Discussion: Chat with producer Marcela Gaviria Wed., May 10, at 11 a.m. ET...Check your local listings.
__ There's a website for everything under and behind the sun these days, and this month you should check out this site because the merry month of May is indeed, National Military Appreciation Month .

Speaking of may, you can catch the latest POET's CORNER written by Jeff Hartzer and published monthly by Albuquerque's South Valley Ink, at Commencements .


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Today in 1794, The United States Post Office was established. Not too long ago, this fellow was photographed by me out in front of FRESHCHAOS HQ...He was in the 'hood to check on some 'mail carrier issues'...GO USPS...

 usps asleep in albuquerque


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This is pretty nifty site: GAS $ by zip code .... Just enter your  zip code in the site below, and it tells you which gas stations have the cheapest prices (and the highest) on gasoline   in your zip codearea. It's updated every evening.


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Sunday, May 07, 2006
SHIFT HAPPENS...

DUH PRES reveals that his best moment in office so far was/is catching big perch in his own pond. This reveals way too much about THE MAN WITHOUT A PLAN, Stan. A Saturday Night Live skit this past weekend has Bush bemoaning the fact that he has so long to go still as President. 'I keep visioning June but it's still May,' he tells Cheney. 'I'm tired of being President...'

The whole world is tired...sad...confused, and concerned . There has been a worldwide shift, a long time coming but SHIFT HAPPENS and it has happened. Bush has lost his War Pres front. He is simply an ignorant Naked Emperor who once abused drugs/alcohol and partied on with the best. His 'truisms just aren't spinnin' like they once did...And the Caddy is runnin' lower on gas. Spinnin' rims don't move the car.

JUSTin:
__I have just been informed by a reader that Dick Cheney flunked out of YALE twice. No wonder he's such a good ole boy.
__Here's 13 ways of looking at an ivory blled woodpecker .
__Kansas sets its own minimum marriage age . You can't be gay in Oz but you can be pretty young at heart and go to the altar.

Anniversaries...This first week of May took me back to Kent State days...Cinquo de Mayo...and Bush's 'Mission Accomplished' announcement. May seems to be a 'Month of SHIFT'...and something truly deep down and wonderful IS shifting. God bless us all. Shift on, Garth; Party on, Wayne!


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Friday, May 05, 2006
Sudan, Darfur Rebels Sign Peace Accord .


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BURNING SPEAR passed through our high desert burg last night and old man, Spear, was nothing if not extraordinary. A packed house attended the show in full Jamaican garb and our world weary moods were lightened by the extravaganza. Thank God for the occasional reggae stream of consciousness to lift spirits back to where we all came from into those rolling waves of universal blissfullness . THE PLANET is shifting. 'Tis true. Look around you and see if you don't see it; feel it ...The time to hesitate is through...



Let's impeach the president for lying,
And leading our country into war.
Abusing all the power that we gave him,
And shipping all our money out the door...


Neil Young
Living With War-2006


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CIA Director Porter Goss has resigned. HAPPY STINKO DE hold my Mayo Clinic Reservation Day...

Here's whas hap-nin on the next episode of THE SOPRANOS .

JUSTin:Readers write:
RE: myspace.com...
__The "My Space" thing is weird. All the kids have one and guys your age and mine are considered predators. Always something on the newz about such. It's kid thing. I can't recall now, but there are others for old farts like us. Mostly, the "my spacers" just want all these cyber "friends" with odd, glamour pictures and such shit. [Well hey, thanks for the encouragement...]
__Congrats to you for entering the world of MySpace!  It looks to be quite the venture, and you can go 'round the universe' with just a couple of clicks.  I went from your site to a self-styled motorin' Marxist, then to a vintage pinup tribute artist.  That happened in less than 2-3 minutes!   I bet you'll find some other kindred spirits out there, very interesting fellow travelers.  I even saw a logo on the side of one page, and I noticed the word "chaos" featured prominently.Get ready for some ride!  Looking forward to hearing about your experiences in the MySpace Universe. [ It's freshly chaotic fo shure...ENCOURAGEMEN...aaah. ]

RE: wireless at the beach...
__Lounging in a chaise at one of the pools with the beach about fifth feet away and a wonderful breeze coming in from the Atlantic, sipping Long Island Iced Teas at The Breakers.....a lot of folks here on this junket are playing golf, but I cannot imagine doing anything other than lounging here watching the Atlantic, the cigarette boats and saiboats, and the pool scene... [ WISH WE COULD ALL BE THERE NOW instead of BEING HERE THEN... ]

__Brazil's Pirahã Tribe: Living without Numbers or Time .
__Looks like Uncle Dick-head has been spending
too much time in the bunker lately...

May 5th means more to me personally than Margaritas and Cervezas...'twas the day my father was born in 1917...

Jeff Hartzer
Jeff & Dad


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Thursday, May 04, 2006
It's a new era for 'the family': Patrick Kennedy DWI?

C.I.A. heckles old man, RUMMIE .


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Wednesday, May 03, 2006




It had to happen, as sure as bunnies love cabbage, I have signed on at MySpace.com and my life has changed in a heartbeat...It's a crazy world of craziness inside there. I will venture to write about my experiences as they unfold around me in MySpace...Jiggle on, Garth. Shake it down, Wayne.


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Two innerestin' snewz stories this day...

_1st)The life of Zacarias Moussaoui is spared. Al-Qaida conspirator Zacarias Moussaoui to life in
prison for his role in the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.


_2nd)Vicente Fox, President of Old Mexico, has caved this evening to pressure from Washington on his earlier statements highly supportive of the drug law changes set to move forward in his country (legalizing a large variety of small amounts of drugs now illegal).

See: FOX CAVES at cnn.com.

The fact that Mexico came even close to becoming the Next Amsterdam ( with beaches and tequila too; (Tah-kah-tay's good!) , indicates to me, a HUGE shift of the whole planetary world away from the bowing down to the RIGHTwing of USA#! powers that be. The 'powers' of the powers to be, show more and more, that our mighty Emperor continues to Go Naked.

Sad state of affairs we currently have with Old Mexico; that old melting pot just got started to be stirred, let alone boiled. It's a gonna be SMOKIN' as the heat builds...Or the WALLS get taller. You gonna put up walls SeenYore, I will DECIDE to make drugs legal...So there.

This Year of the Dog continues in full HOWL... [ In dog years, International justice will be the order of the year. Causes, protests and the righting of wrongs defines Dog years. Out of intense complexities, intense simplicities emerge. [From: Year of the Fire Dog by Shelly Wu.]

Speaking of justice or lack thereof, I wonder how that FAT BASTARD, Raymond Lee, is doing this week after stepping down from on high at EXXON MOBILE? Hope he continues to eat healthy foods and skip more deserts. Perhaps by now, he has hired a personal trainer (or three) with bodacious tah-tahs...


I hate DOG years...


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CNN.com reporting now that the earlier reported earthquake is possibly not as large as was originally reported...Tsunami Warnings have been dropped for Figi and surrounding islands. Still a 7.8 scale earthquake is 'up there' on that Andy Richter scale.


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Tsunami Could Strike New Zealand, Fiji This truly JUSTin...The U.S. National Weather Service warns that a tsunami could strike Fiji within 30 minutes and New Zealand within 90 minutes. An earthquake struck early Thursday near Tonga.


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Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Fresh Chaos Quote of the Momento:"Those who hate you don't win unless you hate them and then you destroy yourself." Richard M. Nixon


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Monday, May 01, 2006
JUSTin from a a reader re: Neil Young:Got caught up on FreshChaos and am really confused by this statement on April 27 blog: "Neil Young who has in the recent past, sided from time to time with the hawks in his pro-war stance (despite his more often 'revolutionary' songlist)"
I read the LA Times story and can't see any reference to Neil having switched from any kind of pro-war stance to where he is now with this new album. Am I missing something or is this an error of some kind?


[NEIL has on occasion sided with 'right wingers' actually...There is nothing in the article linked to about this however. Sorry for the cornfusion.]

A Fresh Chaos factoidal: Because of the soaring price of ZINC, the U.S. Government is spending more to produce a henny penny than its 1-cent face value. Source: New York Times.


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13:25:45 hours into this day without Immigrants and I am alive and well. If you are reading this from your cyberspace outpost in Swahili Land you must still be alive too...Will try to make my way out for provisions after this posting...


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So much Chaos,
So little time.

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