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Tuesday, May 31, 2005
These just in; our readers write: Here is a website you maybe will find interesting. That sneaky
NCLB has really far reaching tentacles...LEAVE MY CHILD ALONE!!!


More on the deep throated one...Subject: from I'm not kidding @ "'
While everyone has their panties in a bunch over the revelation that Watergate informant "Deep Throat" is actually former FBI top brass W. Mark Felt, one has to wonder: How does WWD Scoop-boy Jacob Bernstein feel about all this?

Since we doubt many of you remember life before 2003 (Lord knows we don't), let's rewind for a moment. In 1999, a high-schooler named Chase Culeman-Beckman wrote a paper for his history class, the title of which was (roughly) Deep Throat is Mark Felt. The paper, naturally, had people wetting themselves on every corner - at which point, Culeman-Beckman revealed a very important childhood friend from his time at a Bridgehampton summer camp:
I was in the "Herons" group along with about fifteen other 8, 9, and 10 year olds . One Friday in July we went on a trip to Long Beach, Sag Harbor, and Jacob [Bernstein], Max and I ended up sitting in the sand precociously talking about politics. It was an election year and I was in favor of George Bush because he had gone to the Greenwich Country Day School where I was attending, while Jacob and Max were for Michael Dukakis, although I do not remember why. At some point, the conversation turned to Nixon and
Watergate . which I knew little, if nothing, about. During the conversation Jacob told me: "Deep Throat was Mark Felt, he's someone in the FBI. I'm 100% sure."

That's Jacob Bernstein, as in the son of Washington Post reporter Carl Bernstein, one of only three people who actually knew Deep Throat's identity (until today). It might be, then, fair to say that Vanity Fair was sorta
scooped by an 8-year-old kid at daycamp. And even if it's not fair, we're still saying it - out of respect for the Bridgehampton Herons, if nothing else.

Dear Peace Lovers:
I feel such a desperation...Iraqi doctors are quitting their hospitals because of"chaos;" there was a new wave of violent fighting across Baghdad yesterday; 9 young Americans who have just died in Iraq; Our volunteer army is essentially broken; Our severely deteriorated image grows dimmer all around the world; and England, which once had friendly feelings towards the U.S., is now turning against us, leaving us with almost no friends across the globe....I am urge you to CALL THE WHITE HOUSE @ 1-202-456-1414 -- as often as you can... As Margaret Mead famously said: "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."
Joan Wile, Director of Grandmothers Aginst The War ; email:

After you CALL THE WHITE HOUSE, you may as well pour yourself a BIG DRINK too. We are doomed and doomered. Well, we made it through the Thanks for the Memories Weekend without nuclear disasters, volcano blows, or anything other than the usual freshchaos. Thank you God.

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Monday, May 30, 2005
Memorial daze begins to fizzle...

In a story worse than Kent State by a long shot...
6 Dead in O-H-I-O...

Well, the movie, Beverly Hills Cop, always made me laugh and now you can get AXEL FOLEY'S RINGTONE and see a video of one crazed frog.

Today's FRESHCHAOS TRUE dialogue (from meeting re: Social Security):
Woman: I work three jobs...
W:You work three jobs?
Woman:Three jobs, yes.
W:Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that...[applause]...Get any sleep? [Laughter]

That is just out and out SAD that an American Woman must work THREE jobs and probably still has lousy health coverage.W thinks it's cute and funny. What a douchebag our President is and continues to be.

Speakin' of American Women...

Here's the GUESS WHO's take on things from the last millennium...

American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come hanging around my door
I don't wanna see your face no more
I got more important things to do
Than spend my time growing old with you
Now woman, stay away,
American woman, listen to what I say
American woman, get away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come knocking around my door
I don't wanna see your shadow no more

Coloured lights can hypnotize
Sparkle someone else's eyes
Now woman, get away
American woman, listen what I say-ay

American Woman, I said get away
American Woman, listen what I say
Don't come a hanging around my door
Don't wanna see your face no more
I don't need your war machines
I don't need your ghetto scenes

American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be
I gotta go, I gotta get away
Baby, I gotta go,
I am dying
I'm gonna leave you woman
(American woman)
You're no good for me
And I'm no good for you
(American woman)
I'll l look you right in the eye
And tell you what I'm gonna do
You know I'm gonna leave, you know I'm gonna go
You know I'm gonna leave,
I'm gonna leave you woman
Goodbye American Woman

SO GO THEN...those damn Canadian rock stars with their FREE health care and guaranteed coverage for the elderly and all.

ATV SNEWZ: You gotta love those all terrain vehicles. Three of them wrecked in one day in our High Desert weekend. One rolled over on a FIVE year old without a helmet and killed him dead. New laws coming soon about helmets and age restrictions. Ain't gonna help that kid who died in a flash of dust yesterday though. OLIVER STONED is arrested for DWI and drug possession over the big weekend. At least he won't get 35 Years for Stealing a TV like Junior Allen of good old North Carolina.

Albuquerque's Unser family was noticeably ABSENT at this year's RAINLESS INDY 500 and DANICA PATRICK another American Woman kicked butt.
The Unser family will soon open a Racing Museum in our Enchanted Land. Check out: UNSER RACING MUSEUM, or don't.

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Saturday, May 28, 2005
Happy Memorial Daze

Memorial Memories...When I was a Lt. in Jacksonville, Florida's Ortega Elementary School's School Boy Patrol, we carried big bamboo sticks with bright red flags and helped kids cross streets. My favorite part was yelling down to the next Patrol Boy to KNOOOCCCKKK OFFF!!! at the end of our busy days. This Rebel Yell would go from block to block military style until all of us Patrol Boys would gather at our lockers and start home for cookies, milk, and Leave it to Beaver.

Those were the days...At the beginning of summer, the Jacksonville Public School System took all the Patrol Boys on a train trip to visit Our Nation's Capitol as a reward for their hard work (not as Republicans). The year I got to go on my big trip, several things happened that still run high in my failing memory bank. One was my father yelling that "TRAINS ARE NEVER ON TIME; WE'LL GET THERE IN PLENTY OF TIME." We arrived at the then HUGE marbled train station LATE. The embarrassment of running alongside this whole shiny Seaboard Coastline passenger train fully loaded with School Boy Patrol dudes and their moms (thus departing exactly on time) trying to find a still open door to leap aboard with my little suitcase is one of those memories I wish I could forget. Another memory from that trip is watching the Washington, D.C. Police cut open a Black boy's plaster cast to remove a huge but skinny knife at the Washington Zoo. Things were a bit odd that year (and continue a bit off kilter even today) racially in Our Nation's Capitol. It was also on that same Washington trip on Memorial Day Weekend that I actually met the NOW LATE, Mr. Eddie Albert on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. He was in great form back then.

Yes, meeting Mister Green Acres himself is now on my 'lifelong celebrity list' along with meeting Al Unser, Sr., Graham Parsons, who graduated one year ahead of me from my Jacksonville high school, Fess Parker, who still wore a coonskin cap at the time, and a most memorable evening spent with Olivia de Havilland. Anyway... so long Mister Green Acres. Happy Trails.

Some Freshchaos Snewz:

_The latest Summer Reading Fest is underway... Check in with Carl Hiaassen to get your reading list off the shelf.

_Who says the weather ain't crazy? Seattle ROCKED BY HEAT WAVE! Bring on the gentle rains soon, please.

_Had the BEST BANG OF MY LIFE! And then, I WENT BLIND!! Go Viagra and Viagra look alikes.

_Ain't going to be NO MORE PRETZELS on NORTHWEST AIRLINES. Thank you, God.

_WOODPECKER ATTACKS!! For some reasons woodpeckers have enjoyed pecking their own reflections in auto mirrors.

_It's all over for the CRANE MAN. Go STUN GUNS aloft!

_JOBS GALORE for MEN and WO-MEN... You too can now join the POSTAL SERVICE or BECOME A FIRE a MEDIC...STENOGRAPHER... You name it , you can do it... BUT YES THERE IS A small catch... First you have to ENLIST in the Armed Forces of what used to be the # 1 Country in the World. And when you start calling those JOB numbers they are going to take a lot of your info before telling you the GOOD NEWS about that 'small catch' about E-N-L-I-S-T-M-E-N-T. Who says the DRAFT is not on its way to you and your family?

Check out these new and improved so-called 'BLIND' ADS for recruitment of soldiers. Things aren't going too well in the U.S. Armed Forces Recruitment Departments. Things are going much slower than that very fast clip of mortar rounds blowing away legs and arms. HOWEVER...with great JOB NEWS like that, maybe even the BUSH TWINS can get a job now that they have grad-eee-ated...!

_WHAT'S THIS...a momentary lapse of Reason for the Republican Dynasty? The vote on BOLTON is delayed?. OH MY GOD! Well that's a start to the next few Days of Our Lives and one more thing we can let go while eating barbequed pigs and stuff this weekend.

_Old Timer's Snewz: Altamont Speedway makes the snewz again. This time, nearly 36 years after the slaying of Meredith Hunter by a member of Hell's Angels, investigators have closed the case, dismissing a theory that a second Hell's Angel was involved. See the Full Story. No one was ever convicted in this case, by the way. Meredith was a Black Male and was said to have been 'carrying a weapon', thus the ruling against the Hell's Angel was determined to be 'self defense'.

_Dateline ALBUQUERQUE: iPODIOUS MAXIMUS... Two Valley High schoolers from our Enchanted Land's largest city have been caught and accused of taking digi-pix of nearly nude female classmates and using their trusty iPods to store the photographs. It is also revealed in this ongoing investigation that the boys are charged also with raping the girls. In good news for APPLE, the iPods were not used in that part of the story.

In this writer's opinion, the Albuquerque Journal's online edition is one of the worst online newspaper sites in existence. If you work 'really hard' (a Republican thing), you might find the headlines from this "Albuquerque iPod/rape story" buried at this particular link page. The title is: Teens' Nude iPod Photos Spur Probe (Friday, May 27, 2005), but then they make you do a dance and a jig to get to the story. So fo-get-a-bout-it.

If it wasn't so hard to read the ABQ JOURNAL online, you might see more of their stories on the W. (for WORLD) W. (for WIDE) W. (for WEB). But nooooo... Even when the Princess Bride was discovered to have RUN AWAY to Albuquerque, it was NOT easy to find a link on the ABQJOURNAL site. It's just another excellent time to quote a trademarked slogan by our current Mayor's staff which reads, "Good For You, Albuquerque!" Sorry for a bit of a RANT/HONK/SCREAM and GAPE, but the local Television web sites here are much more helpful and, like most things world-wide-web-related, are FREE and EASY to navigate.

_LAST but not LEAST is the AMAZINGLY HIGH FLYING STORY that Hunter S. Thompson's ashes will soon be SHOT OUT OF A CANNON. The desire of HST to have himself 'canonized' is not entirely freshchaos, but the new design of THE TOWER of POWER shaped like the HST 'FIST' to do such a thing is pretty fresh. Also the snewz that the moolah to pay for it all is coming from that Agent of Chaos, Johnny Depp... Go Johnny Go.

Happy Memorial Daze

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Thursday, May 26, 2005
This just in ... our readers write:
Here is the Offical Vote on Priscilla Richman Owen:
A strict party-line vote with the exceptions of Lincoln Chafee (R-RI) Voted NO, while Robert Byrd (D-WV) voted YES. Jim Jeffords (I-VT) also voted NO. U.S. Senate Roll Call Votes 109th Congress - 1st Session as compiled through Senate LIS by the Senate Bill Clerk under the direction of the Secretary of the Senate: Vote Summary- Question: On the Nomination (Confirmation Priscilla Richman Owen, to be U.S. Circuit Judge) Vote Number: 128 Vote Date: May 25, 2005, 11:58 AM...Required For Majority: 1/2 Vote Result: Nomination Confirmed.

- "Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer but the right answer." - J.F.K.
- "Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." - M.L.K.

A groovy link: Organic produce heroes proclaim the worth of getting back to "the Good Side of The Farm" and oppose the evil artificially enhanced veggies of the Dark Side: STOREWARS "Use The Farm, Cuke!"

Jennifer Wilbanks indicted for RUNNING AWAAAAAAY...

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Wednesday, May 25, 2005
HOT! Paris Hilton too hot for tv, but not as hot as it has been here in the High Desert. We have gone from Spring to Summer in one week. The snow is melting in the mountains causing flooding of all things in the hot, arid and mile-high desert.

Embryonic Journey... The Jefferspon Airplane couldn't have said it better. Hooray for Stem Cell Research. Is this the beginnings of bi-partisan SANITY?

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005

So you're reading the paper and the doorbell rings. You look out the window and see a D.H.L. Delivery truck. "Thanks," you say to the female delivery person as you sign in blood for the the big envelope. Inside your comfortable home your wife opens it to learn that her Health Insurance is canceled retroactively; that she suddenly has had but officially HAS NOT HAD any health insurance for months; that in fact she is now cast into the UNINSURABLE pool of folks including those with failed kidneys, A.I.D.S. and other dire distress-ors... all because of infrequent migraines and miscommuniques from her Primary Care Doctor who was part and parcel of her old health insurance program that she let go of to embrace the new one some months ago.

HEALTH CARE in this country has become the NUMBER ONE TERRORIST. Until the National Draft for the little old Iraq War comes along (and it is coming), Health Care is Number One on our list of Terrors. Hard to get and easy to lose. And no matter what level you are on, it is costly and for the self-employed, under-employed, self-enjoyed USA citizen trying to be an Independent Business Entrepreneur Capitalist it IS THE NUMBER ONE TERRORIST to defeat who is RIGHT UP IN YOUR FACE and delivering death knells straight to your and my front doorstep.

Sorry, I just haven't felt like writing or creating much these past few days. I am praying for the white light to protect my wife from catastrophic chaos until she can climb back onto the Insurance Donkey or Elephant.

Whatz the Good Newz?
_Good to see that as our own Family Health Plan SNAFUS, that Rapists Get VIAGRA for free. The joys of having a penis never end.
_Good to see that as the numbers of the USA's homeless grows, that we can afford to SINK AN AIRCRAFT CARRIER for fun (and profit?).
_Good to see that as our HOMELAND SECURITY DEPT. grows wealthy a grenade thrown near the President was NOT a dud.

Meanwhile to see our President wearing academic gowns and regalia at Calvin College while even the Calvin and Hobbes College Christians wear buttons and protest that "Christ was neither a Dem or Repub"... Well, HE hasn't looked that uncomfortable since HE sat with Queen Elizabeth in the Royal Palace. And HIS wife had quite a struggle getting through the mobs of angered folk on her latest AIRFORCE ONE FLIGHT OF FANTASY AND DISTRACTION overseas.

Filly-Busters or not, things are going to pot here in the US of A. Thank G-d we can still go get our money's worth in Mexico. Forget about your European vacation this year. Too pricey. And sell your stock now; invest Internationally. With our farmlands going to suburban sprawl and Wallie Worlds, this country is going to have to bomb and rebuild more foreign soils to build up the economy. Our food and BLACKBERRIES aren't coming from our own self-sustaining Land anymore.

And SAD MAN Saddam looks sadder still in his underwear. But the price we have paid and are paying for those photographs of Saddam is intolerable and growing more so with each passing second of Tom-(can't)-Delay the end of the world.

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Thursday, May 19, 2005
These links just in... our readers write: To receive email notices of scams, hoaxes and Urban Legends, sign up at SCAMBUSTERS! It is free. I've received them for several years now.

10x10 ('ten by ten') is an interactive exploration of the words and pictures that define the time. The result is an often moving, sometimes shocking, occasionally frivolous, but always fitting snapshot of our world.

This week the Albuquerque ISOTOPES (formerly The Dukes) played the Tacoma RAINIERS (formerly The Tigers). Each team took a few wins and losses, but having the Rainiers come to town reminds me of my four years of life spent in "rainytown Tacoma" under the "eyes" of THE MOUNTAIN, Mt. Rainier, originally called Mt. TAHOMA by the Natives there.

In several cable network shows seen yesterday, Mt. Rainier was labeled the "most dangerous Volcano in the world". These shows (on The Weather Channel and National Geographic Channel) made liberal mention of SEATTLE with NO mention of Tacoma. I found it funny to live in Tacoma where the Tacoma Dome was created from trees blown away in the exploding eruption of Mt. St. Helens, whose Big Eruption 25th Anniversary was yesterday. There is a strong similarity in my mind between the relationships of Tacoma/Seattle and Albuquerque/Santa Fe. Tacoma has everything Seattle does and is closer to Mt. Rainier (a truly amazing sight to see daily when it "comes out" of the clouds at 14,410 feet high), but the real esate and coffee prices are cheaper in Tacoma. Tacoma actually was built ahead of Seattle thanks to the train lines there. Ditto Albuquerque, where the price of an enchilada is much lower than in The City Different, but the reputation of ABQ suffers highly compared to Santa Flush. If you fly here to visit Santa Fay or Taos you got to land in our town at one of the nation's prettiest airports, the Albuquerque International (?) Sunport). So bravo to Tacoma and Albuquerque and take that Seattle Santa Fe snobs.

And it seems that 25 years since Mt. St. Helens blew was not so long ago. Alas it was.

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Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Perhaps you've noticed that I am a bit OBSESSED with news and views from around our wobbling planet. One of the reasons years ago I finallly opted in for DirecTv was to get the old (new to me) 24/7 CNN Headline Newz so that at any time night or day I could without waiting for the morning paper, turn on the tube and get the HEADLNE NEWS right then and there. This seems logical enough. And for me was a pleasant service provided by your friendly cable or satellite dealer, like getting the weather forecast whenever.

Well I guess this wasn't enough for the average CNN'er... NOOOOOOOO! They have to change the 24/7 headline format (which yes, admittedly did 'repeat' frequently until some 'newer' Bride ran away or more than 15 died in Iraq at a time. I imagine many (like me) turned onto the channel, caught the headlines, then flew away to other channels without taking in the 'commercial content'.... For whatever reason now the Headline News has an Entertainment section and a Prime Time section and the STUPID IDIOTIC new celebrity on my list to HATE: Ms. Nancy Grace. I just can't stand the woman! Or the format. It is refreshing on the weekend at 2 in the morning or whenever to hear the little CNN Headline News jingle diddy played and go back for a moment to the way it used to be in the old days of Headline News... Fast and furious headlines. N-O-W. Simple, plain, and without too much silly bantering or interpretation by the commentators.

Oh well.


Ouch...and this doensn't even mention the weird story in this morning's Albuquerque Journal about the Black State Trooper who was handcuffed to a telephone pole by his fellow WHITE (or ANGLO as we call Whites in these parts) trooper during the raging fire that hit Los Alamos five years ago. (Now that was some 'freshchaos' and was mentioned in this column... but of course... in which a 'controlled burn' by the Federal Govt. almost blew up the world). Read the official Govt. Report about that little controlled burn incident heard round the world in 2000.

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Tuesday, May 17, 2005

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Monday, May 16, 2005

So says Dave Chappelle after returning from a 'spiritual journey' to Africa. We are still crossing our fingers and toes that his third season begins soon because next week ends DEADWOOD for another year and RENO 911 just can't meet up with the laughs of the Chappelle Show. At least Comedy Central still has Jon Stewart's Daily Show going great guns.

There's a NEW RODENT SPECIES on the planet. This is a good thing as this weekend I spoke to a WWII veteran friend of my father, who still runs his family farm in Wisconsin. He told me thanks to pesticides and general world wide chaos inflicted upon the GLOBE we live on, there are no more Bobwhites, Whippoorwills, or Snakes around his property. Instead of the old style of turning over the soil to reduce the amount of WEEDs, now pesticides are used, which has resulted in the loss of many former 'farmland residents'. Not to mention the daily loss of farmland itself to spreading suburbia and Wallie Worlds.

Once again, the once funny Dennis Miller has lost an on-air job. He really has sort of tried to have it both ways in recent years and folks, it just ain't working for the man. Buh-bye Dennis.

The Empire Strikes Bush!! Is 'W' a Sith or a Jedi? You make the call.

Now you can buy your RUNAWAY BRIDE action figures at Hero Builders dot com. Or save money and run around naked screaming RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY... a la Monty Python's Holy Grail.


As we waited in line to enter Mexico two weeks ago, The Deb peeked at the immigration forms of the couple ahead of us in line and saw that they were from Nebraska and that for Nationality they had written Caucation. They were still at Immigration when we passed through Customs and into the island paradise of Cozumel.

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Sunday, May 15, 2005

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Saturday, May 14, 2005
It's a long-assed shot, but word is out that Albuquerque is one of the many cities being 'considered' as a host for the soon to be moving New Orleans' Saints. Ooh Baby. And pigs can fly, too!

A New Mexican military base (Cannon AFB) scheduled to close will cost the jobs of one in five residents of Clovis, N.M. Meanwhile the Ft. Bliss Military base where our President (while in the Crawford, Texas all-White House) is often seen attending church with the troops will gain some 11,000 new jobs/soldiers. Very innerestin'...

The military base to close is the BIG BILLION DOLLAR ONE IN IRAQ!!

This just in; a reader writes: Dear President Bush,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from you and understand why you would propose and support a constitutional amendment banning same
sex marriage. As you said, "in the eyes of God, marriage is based between a man a woman." I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination.... End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her (allowing for inflation)?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it? If the latter, would it better to use a Christian officer on a Saturday, or a Jewish officer on a Sunday? What if the only officer available is a 7th Day Adventist or a Muslim (i.e., Friday Sabbath)?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination as outlined in Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? (My friend really likes shrimp). Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev.21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole
town together to stone them (Lev. 24:10-16)? Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws (Lev. 20:14)?

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

A Citizen Who Cares

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Friday, May 13, 2005
Military to close bases brings fear and loathing to many military families and Chamber of Commerces in many cities. Meanwhile enlistment figures continue to be WAY down and there is a move to go from BLUE to BROWN and we don't mean UPS.

Actually the top brass calls it their Blue to Green initiative. Get rid of the Navy and Air Force and build up them ARMY of a few to go in to face to face combat on the fly. No wonder enlistment figures are down. Enlist and die, MoFo! So far the blue to green to orange and red program is a BIG flop. SNAFU was a term originated in the Armed Forces and it stands to reason that there is plenty of SNAFU to go around these days. THE DRAFT IS COMING...

Sandia prep makes the big time news this week in Newsweek magazine. Congratulations to this Albuquerque school with a teacher to student ratio amounting to one teach for 9 kids. Not bad. No wonder they be a-lurnin'.

A Texas (where else) lawmaker has made a bill that would prohibit cheerleaders from wearing or doing "overtly sexually suggestive" moves or clothing. Damn it, Cartman!

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Thursday, May 12, 2005
Say it ain't so...Dave Chappelle In Mental Health Facility. No wonder his show keeps getting pushed back. Two GREAT seasons and now...

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This just in: a reader writes: Man keeps Florida Skunk Ape legend alive. Thank g-d for some funny times.

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Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Unplugged: to swim with fishies

Well, not much has changed in one week. "W" has not choked to death on a pretzel but his hand holding with that cute Saudi still carries a bit of flack.

China Rises: while the rest of us sleep..."in 25 years China has moved 300 million people out of poverty and quadrupled the average person's income"...says "Newsweek". 'The House of Flying Daggers' is one great thing the Chinese produced last year to name a few thousand. Our own farmlands are disappearing daily. We continue to import more than we export. As Capn' Kirk once uttered, ' How long, Spock...For just how long?'

It was interesting to visit a foreign country [ Cozumel, Mexico ] this past week and see that Mexico remains one of the few countries where the USD (U.S. Dollar) can still rack up a peso or two above it's current value here (11 pesos to the almighty dollar...but a EURO gets you 13 to one)...The United States is headed downhill folks and there's no getting around it. We are all so used to the idea of Global warming and high gas prices and being lied to, over and over that we are numb to the fact that WE ARE LOSING in the battle for numero uno...And why not go ahead and put Bolton in at the U.N...Can it get worse? Three more plus years to go...yes it can.

Thank god for a week of floating with fishes in the most beautifully clear and turquoise waters I have ever swam in (including Hawaii, Florida, Bahamas, Puerto Vallarta) and realize that things go on underwaer no matter how many U.S. Submarine sonar units are causing chaos for dolphins or how the Northern and Southern Polar Ice Caps are melting or how Bolton may yet lead out nations U.N. delegation or how, my own brother makes news in a gay bashing sort of way. Way to go world.

Thank the Lord of the Republican/Christian Hey-Sus, Allah, G-d, Great Spirit, Buddha, Krishna, Baal, Quetzalcoatl, Zeus,Thor, Ixchel, Isis, and Alan Greenspan that my wife and I had the funds and where with all to take some time OFFLINE and swim away from the FRESHCHAOS that just piles up day after day after day around the planet.

I took time to read the most moving book which I can easily recommend to the masses and apparently I am one of the last people among the masses to have read it as it is a huge best seller; it is Alice Sebold's "THE LOVELY BONES". Very, very moving on deep levels. Thank the gods also that we have found a 'house sitter' who loves our BunnytownUSA rabbits, our tropical fish, house plants, and our three maniacally 'gifted and talented' , Schipperke dogs (who are a handful). Perhaps we will journey away from home more than once a year now.


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Monday, May 02, 2005
The authors of are in:

We'll be back online before Friday the Thirteenth. Ya'll come back now.

The 10th anniversary of my mother's passing occurred recently. I have a poem I wrote that seems appropriate to share at this time called, "In a private place of trees"...Be sure to enjoy each and every Spring that you have left to live...!!

In a private place of trees

I am alive
for me
and for you
I am alive that I may breathe
and eat sweet cookies
And though
I am not a bird
I am alive that I may fly
To love the art of flying
And love the way
the earth breathes
and is alive
in this private place of trees

I am alive and today
I leave you behind
in all of your private places
while I begin my climb walking right up
through these trees on this rope ladder to the sky
I walk right up
from the arms of this earth
bare tree limbs calling to Spring
I walk right up
from the earth that moves beneath you
like a giant sleeping bear
about to awaken from sleep

I am alive
and I climb right up
from your opened arms
into the breath of this perfect sky

Jeff Hartzer
© 1995

in memoriam

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Sunday, May 01, 2005
MAYDAY, MAYDAY we're all going down...

North Korea's Foreign Ministry spokesman says that G.W.Bush is ''a half-baked man in terms of morality and a philistine whom we can never deal with," He describes Bush as the ''world's dictator">who as president has ''turned the world into a sea of blood.".That's not a good way to start the month of May.

And then North Korea fires a missile into the sea of Japan. Let's look at something more pleasant such as the ducklings are hatching at the U.S. Treasury in Washington, DC. You Go girls and boys. Nice job by the U.S. Secret Sevice who has been guarding the ducks during their special 'nesting time' in this rather special location.

This just in from a reader:
Terry Riley, sent the following message to the members of New Mexico Democratic Friends:
 I am a veteran with one son who has served in Afghanistan who is now getting ready to return.  He is being held in the Army beyond his contract by Stop Loss Orders.  I feel strongly as a veteran and personally because of my son's situation, I hope that you look at this
information and consider signing the petition.

Some good snewz for liberal tree huggers like myself:
Navajo Nation President Joe Shirley Jr. on Friday signed a measure that outlaws uranium mining and processing on the Indian reservation that sprawls across parts of Arizona, New Mexico and Utah. GO the world; let uranium sit in the safety of Mother Earth's arms.
Happy first day of May!

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So much Chaos,
So little time.

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