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Wednesday, March 31, 2004
Freshchaos tidbits:
A new Starbucks opens at the rate of 3 and one half per day worldwide. Their long term plan is to have 25,000 worldwide; currently there are 8,000. Time to invest in the other black gold?

Santa Fe, New Mexico aka: 'The City Different' and/or 'Santa Flush', has been ranked number two in the book "Cities Ranked and Rated" by Bert Sperling and Peter Sander. Man, I'd like to be ranked and rated. Sounds like fun in the sun. AARP rated Santa Fe as one of the best places to 'reinvent yourself'. Go Santa Flush.

Thanks to the Low Carb diet craze, Laxative makers are now pursuing a younger crowd. Go laxative makers . Around the bowl and down the hole...go-go-go.

Freshchaos Quote of the moment:
Unable to defend his policies in a coherent way and unwilling to acknowledge his mistakes, Bush responds to criticism with ugliness. Joe Klein ( Newsweek Magazine ).


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Tuesday, March 30, 2004
The White House will let Condoleezza Rice-GATE testify in public under oath in a Sept. 11 commission hearing! Joy.


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Sunday, March 28, 2004
Last weekend at the AirDance ArtSpace, a freshly chaotic time was had by all in the theatrically magnificent and tone-ally perfect musical presentation of the Skumbaag Reunion Show . From as far away as Massachusetts, Wisconson and Arizona, John Bartlit, Hovey Corbin, Craig McLellan, Doug Nottingham, Eric Schulty, and grand lighting master, Jeff Benham reunited under one high roof to provide perfuntory chaos and music for all. An ill Andy Fietek was missed but his stand in did well on short notice. This promises to become an annual event!

The action is a click away...


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Friday, March 26, 2004
Spamosity:
Ok, I have really been enjoying my Apple spamanator filtering system for a time now. Until recently it has worked like a charm. However, the latest thing that is now daily squirming into my inbox is spam mailed from 'so and so' at my own address. AAAAAHHHHH!!
How do they do that? Those BASTARDS. THE HORROR...the horror.


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My fellow 'mericans...

The Bushmaster is in our Enchanted town today. Hunched over the mike at our blue collared State Fairgrounds, he was dressed in a tieless-suitless-long- sleeved-open-necked-blue-collared shirt presenting his 'pro-growth' without 'growth' policies to the 400 invited guests most of whom also donning similar shirts.

He meets with our 19 Pueblo Governors then its off to Phoenix for another show. His latest weapon of mass distraction is Broadband for everyone by 2007. Let's all go to Mars on a Broad Bands of those Hydrogen cars 'W' is so crazy about. Let's just forget about the lack of new jobs, better schools, or peace in the middle east or at home.

Just in...freshchaos Quotes

"Had I known that the enemy was going to use airplanes to strike America, to attack us, I would have used every resource, every asset, every power of this government to protect the American people."-- President Bush quoted yesterday by the Associated Press.

On August 6, 2001, President Bush personally "received a one-and-a-half page briefing advising him that Osama bin Laden was capable of a major strike against the US, and that the plot could include the hijacking of an American airplane."-- NBC News, 9/10/02, via the Center for American Progress.

***

Here's A Rancher's Perspective on "W"

While suturing a laceration on the hand of a 70-year-old Texas rancher (whose hand had caught in a gate while working cattle), a doctor and the old man were talking about George W. Bush being in the White
House.

The old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a 'post turtle'." Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was. The old man said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."

The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain, "You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid bastard get down."


***

This week has been a tough one for the almighty Republicans. It has been a gaggle of laughs for fans of Jon Stuart's Daily Shows. Richard Clarke's revelations after thirty years of government work under elephant and donkey Presidents, are simply too amazingly true to be funny. It is amazing that the heads of our country can literally claim the Richard Clarke, the Head of our Nation's counter terrorism organization, is/was 'out of the loop'. Come on...Once again the surrealism of it all is too much to handle.

Fortunately for the Bushies, it is certainly too much for the uneducated media masses blinded by the lights of Mel's Passion who will be voting for the insane Mister Bush no matter what apparently. Speaking of The Passion, I am not a big South Park fan, but next week Kyle, one of the cartoon characters attends the Passion of the Christ movie. I'll have to 'Tivo' that one on our 'classic' VCR.

In other freshchaos:
An artist from Greenland has painted an iceberg with 750 gallons of red paint. Now that's 'art' or is it?

P. Cruz & T. Cruise have split up after a three year relationship. Damnit Tom make up your mind. These two are obviously more victims of those damn Gay Marriages.

Richard Simmons brutally (ha!) slaps a guy in an airport for making fun of his 'doping it to the Oldies' methods of weight controlling excercise. Ouch.

Comet Records releases a cover song compilation tribute album to Great White called, Burning House of Love, proving again that 'mericans suffer severe short term memory loss...It wasn't THAT long ago that Great White's pyrotechnical Gapingness caused the deaths of 100 patrons of another Burning House of Love in Westwarwick, Rhode Island. After complaints were received, Comet Records will rename the album. DUH.

BTW: What would Jesus do with the profits from His own movie?

This just in...Try this very soon, before someone forces Google to
fix its site. It was good as of 9:30 PM, Tuesday 3/23.

1) Go to Google.com

2) In the search window, type in "weapons of mass
destruction". DO NOT hit "return". DO NOT hit "Google
search".

3) Hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button.

4) Read the "error message" carefully. Read the WHOLE
page. Try the links, very smart. Someone at Google
really has a sense of humor. And will probably be
fired soon!!!!



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Monday, March 22, 2004
Zombies eat Hey Seuss
Uncle Mel's 'Passion' has flamed out or at least mellowed down to the #2 spot in movie mania news. Dawn of the Dead, a remake of zombie chaos took over at #1. Go Zombies.

No wonder the Stock Market is way down this Monday. That or the rockets fired from Israeli helicopters at the parapalegic founder of Hamas. Or maybe it's because W comes to Albuquerque Friday. The Street is a mixed bag of coyote tricks these days. Thank god we went to war a year ago and spend 73 billion a day to save Iraq. Bring back The Passion; go home Zombies.

Albuquerque's NCAA March Madness adventure vacuumed itself up like a tornado over Kansas as the Lady Lobos became Gator bait on Saturday night. Must have been the dark of the moon as the Lobos did not howl.

Some good news as Spring continues its spring...At the AirDance ArtSpace, a freshly chaotic time was had by all in the theatrically magnificent and tone-ally perfect musical presentation of the Skumbaag Reunion Show . From as far away as Massachusetts, Wisconson and Arizona, John Bartlit, Hovey Corbin, Craig McLellan, Doug Nottingham, Eric Schulty, and grand lighting master, Jeff Benham reunited under one high roof to provide perfuntory chaos and music for all. An ill Andy Fietek was missed but his stand in did well on short notice. This promises to become an annual event! (fuzzy pictures coming soon).



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Friday, March 19, 2004
March Madness: tidbits of freshchaos

A year ago today, the entire world was shocked and awed. I still am.
A European man ran down another man with his automobile (no doubt a Peugot) because he looked like Osama Bin Laden. A bill now in congress would place the reward money at fifty million American dollars. Geeze.

Is it possible to add to the light rather than to the darkness? In Albuquerque, we are already as of yesterday at the time when there are equal hours of light and dark. Now, if we could just decide whether to have red or green chile on our enchiladas we'd be set for Spring.

"I had gone so far out on a limb with my feelings, I didn't realize I was standing there alone." Cary Bradshaw and possibly all our whole military industrial complex.

Tiger Woods will take part in four days of miulitary training at Ft. Bragg, N.C. This to appease or please his father, EARL, a Vietnam Veteran Green Beret.

Courtney Love bares her breasts to Dave Letterman (six times!) on the Late Show then later is charged with 'reckless endangerment' and 'third-degree assault' at a New York nightclub after clobbering a man with a microphone stand. She already faces felony drug charges in California and, Oh Yeah, just came out with her new solo cd entitled, America's Sweetheart.

Freshchaos declares Dave Chappell to be America's Eddie Izzard.

Oh, and there's basketball stuff happening too. The UNM Lady Lobos take on the University of Florida Lady Gators in Round One of the NCAA playoffs this Saturday night at our world famous Pit.



Meet-cha at THE PIT




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Tuesday, March 16, 2004
Good old Al Sharpton passes the gas onto Col. Kerry and Dennis never-say-die Kucinich. Sorry to see you go, big Al.


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Hey-Seuss!


This week in freshchaos ville we recall where we were a year ago. Off to the mighty war with shock and awesome-ness. Ahh the good old days. In odd irony the Wallstreet crashing bear market of last year's war-doom/bust has re-appeared these past ten days. The annual October Crash seems now hinged on Springtime.

A year ago how different and the same we all were. Frankly, my life is not much improved by the 500 plus soldiers dying and the Iraqi bloodshed. In many ways on many levels things are same same or worse worse. The bombs of Spain rain mainly on the train and let's vote for socialists in the anyone but Bush election campaign l'España.

I'll have a dry Gibson on the rocks.::> Springtime arrives in force this weekend about the time the green beer flows out of the Mel Gibson theater goers. Happy days are here again for the penitent flagellators. Jesus Christ, it's Mel Gibson! Mel...Jesus! Christ...Mel! Life's not the same as last year. Jesus Christ Mel Gibson Jesus Mel Christ Gibson...Oh Jesus. Mel. Christ. Gibson! Life's not the same as last week.

How is it that Smell's movie is such a hit? Is there a need to purge our sins for going to War without a plan? Is it our need to masticate the masses with a two hour sit in the dark with bloody flagellations pornographically displayed? Or do we just love Aramaic? Do we prefer to watch Hey-Seuss than our soldiers suffering through their Missions of Peace? Will we be made better by witnessing the pillaging of the Christ? Is it our Lenten duty to attend?

Hey-Seuss has many facets and faces. Many Hey-Seuss movies and stories over time. There's Hey-Seuss the manger babe. Hey-Seuss the child. Hey-Seuss tossing the money changers. Hey-Seuss with the wise old guys. Hey-Seuss and Ben Hur. Hey-Seuss serving vino at the wedding winning the good graces of His Mother's bridge club friends. Hey-Seuss alone in the desert. Hey-Seuss in the garden. Hey-Seuss discovers herbal remedies. Hey-Seuss making bread and fish dishes. Hey-Seuss grows a beard. Hey-Seuss on the cross. Hey-Seuss lights candles in the rain. Hey-Seuss sermon-ing on the mount. Hey-Seuss steps off the dock of the bay. Hey-Seuss out fishing in the calm waters. Hey-Seuss making the not-so-calm-waters calm again. Hey-Seuss denied. Hey-Seuss goes on the world wide web. Hey-Seuss palm frondedly praised riding an ass. Hey-Seuss and The Rising from the grave. Hey-Seuss does His laundry. Hey-Seuss appears after death. And of course there's Hey-Seuss conversing with George W. Bush.

Our halo-ed President has Hey-Seuss on His side. Sanctimoniously sacrosanct, our country's leader waves His little smiley faced waves hopping on helicopters with unanswered questions thrown away in the winds of the war weary. Sad to see the President of Spain fall from graces. The Hey-Seuss of Spain must be a different Hey-Seuss. Here's to the Hey-Seuss of Great Britain.

This weekend brings in a new moon, and a new season; any second now, our clocks 'Spring ahead' (04/04/04)...It is a time for fast growth and the breaking away from the old. Thing is, if plants shoot up too fast they wither. Birthing is hard; death harder. Rapid change is scary.

We all need cling-ons. Right now it's Gay Marriages, March Madness and the Sopranos final season. Let's Stone Martha. Suckle at the horror of Janet's teat. Wear Manolo Blahniks. Move on to the feet of Mel's 'Hey-Seuss'. Forget the madness of last year's war that was not a war. WMDs or the lack thereof still bother a few of the non-patriots but the masses have blissfully moved on dot org. W's World is so surrealistically evil and wrapped in the cloak of Our Lord, that sugary sweet disasters go down without much of a stretch of the throat for the massively media-moved masses.

Leave no child behind in the so-enormous-it-is-incomprehensible-to-all-DEBT that all our children are inheriting this very moment and the next and the next. Who Cares? It's those damn men marrying men we care about. Those damn bastardos.
Test the children. Test the teachers. Kill the pot plants. Arrest the herbalists. Fire up the monopolies making money in jail management. Let schools falter and fail outside the new jails and courts.

Next comes Base-ah-ball, vacation season and down the long road, hurricanes and football season again. Along the way, Hi-Lo carb diets will come and go. All things must pass. Election Erections. The end of the world. World War II vets pass onto their grassy graves and generations of swine rise and fall. Nothing remains the same except for our need for things to cling-onto.

Things in America must be clearly labeled. There is no middle ground. Things are on 'my side or your side'...black/white...all/nothing...Republican/Democrat...Catholic/Jew...Good/Bad...gay/straight...right/wrong. Wrong-O.

Things in nature just aren't that way. They are mixed. They transit. They blend. There is no right or wrong tornado, rainbow, lightning bolt. There are no black or white clouds. Things move in constant flux and blends. Musically, naturally. Oh so groovily. Explosively without judgments or rights or wrongs.

Have you noticed that the Big Dipper has returned to the night sky and that Orion is moving away? Seasons change. We live, we die, we cling. And we pay mightily to wait in line for high and mighty Doctors to greet us with How R U today? Not too good, Dude.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I just can't seem to join in with the massively media-moved masses. I find myself in flux and disagreement. I find that all I want to do is talk to animals and soak up the sun with Sheryl Crow. Is that so bad? Depends on who you are. Where you stand on the issues. What kind of SUV you have. Do you live in the heights or the valleys? Are you a good witch or a bad witch? Do you love Hey-Seuss or admire the Buddha? Are you more Shocked and Awe-Shucked by Janet's teat or by the insanity of today's American love-it-or-leave-it Ways?


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Saturday, March 13, 2004
While I have had a bad case of get outside and enjoy the faintest glimpses of Spring going on and have left freshchaos to wither and gasp...a friend has put up a whole spanking new blog...visit it for a spell at Wayne's Movie blog. It's a beauty.


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Thursday, March 11, 2004
Freshchaos tidbits...
Times are hard for clowns local newscaster re: a National Clown Convention held this week in Albuquerque. Clowns are going gaga in our fair city this week as are an entire airport full of recreational vehicles gathered for a National RV Convention. Some of these motor mansions are valued at over a milllion dollars each. A vacant airport is home away from home to these mastadons of roadside luxury.

Ashcroft has lost his gall bladder and the Stock Market is correcting itself in a big way d-o-w-n. Any connections? "In America, if a man puts something into a man, it had better be a bullet." Bill Maher in regard to gay marriages. He and others have suggested that it is the idea of two males bonded in holy matrimony that is gaining the ire of most homophobes. Two women bonding...Oooh baby...that's aok.

Martha Stewart to be hanged at dawn. She's a woman and she's a Democrat. Makes sense in the US of A in an election year. Now take one Berney Ebbers (no one knows his 'name', a male, a Republican, a white guy, lost World Commies billions) ; he'll get a box of bad cigars and probation.


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Monday, March 08, 2004
Weeks ago there was a freshchaos entry regarding the fact the one of our favorite writers/actors was missing. I heard on the radio today that Spalding Gray's body has been found. I can not find any Googled or otherwise NEWS stories about this, but one of his friends has written quite a blogging bit about him... Spalding Gray link

Later today ...
It's true...this article Eonline: Spalding Gray was posted just two hours ago - found through the Google News site.


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Friday, March 05, 2004
It's not a good thing::> Martha Stewart Guilty On All Counts! After three days of deliberations, the jury in the Martha Stewart trial finds her guilty of all charges.


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Tuesday, March 02, 2004
You got your FAT Tuesdays and you got your slimmed-down John-Edwards-is-out-of-there-Super-Tuesdays. Buh Bye.


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Monday, March 01, 2004
Happy March First. Our congrats to the Oscarriffics most especially the magical kingdom of "Lords and Rings".

A benchmark weekend moving us closer to Spring, this Leap Year weekend will go down in my mind for Saturday's Evening with Neil Young. The location for our high desert show was Albuquerque's Tingley Coliseum, a place usually reserved for rodeos but our floor seats in row 19 were fabuloso rendering a great view of the sound stage and set up for both the Greendale and Crazy Horse segments of the show.

'Greendale' is a collection of vignettes centered around the people of a fictional, coastal California town (our sources say that town is Pescadero) brought to life in song and slide images. Live actors (including Neil's wife, Pegi, daughter, Amber and one son, Ben) mingle with both filmed backgrounds and the live music of Neil Young and Crazy Horse. It is a cd, a concert series and now too a movie. On March 5th, 'Greendale The Movie' will be shown at our local Madstone Theater.

When Neil was last in our town performing at the outdoor mega arena sized Journal Pavilion, Neil was a bit low key for that show understandably as an older member of the International Harvesters had just passed away. Prior to that concert his last Albuquerque concert featured 'The Shocking Pinks', Neil's short lived rock-a-billy fest. This Leap Year concert will go down in my mind as his best Albuquerque effort by far.

The Greendale tour holds nothing back and is perhaps even better than the time I saw Neil in 1971 when he was "journeying through the past". Ironically that was his first tour that featured an accompanying movie "Journey Through the Past". Hopefully, the Greendale Movie will be more cohesive than the experimental 'Journey Through the Past' cinema event.

After a magnificent showing of the entire 'Greendale play' with actors, large movie screen vignettes, all on a stage supporting both the band and stage left, the Greendale jail ; stage right, Granpa's house , there was a brief intermission. Neil and Crazy Horse returned to play an amazing collection of 'oldies'. They began with an electrically haunting version of All Along the Watchtower which Dylan and Hendrix could've been proud of. After intoning the line two riders were approaching repeatedly, they merged right into My,My Hey,Hey(out of the blue into the black) with a brilliantly lit backdrop of the words Rust Never Sleeps. A bit of Arc feedbacking lead then into Powderfinger.

This may have been enough but folks, it just got better and better. Possibly the very
best rendition I have ever heard of Down by the River came next and lasted long into the high and low tides. This was followed by what seemed to be the last song, Roll Another Number with lights coming up at the end of this 'late night ride home sort of song'. But then, Rockin' in the Free World was played with an ad-libbed line, trouble on the street, red, white, and blue...losin' boys every day, cuz you never had a plan...we got a kinder gentler machine gun hand. The song ended with an electrically moving solo military 'Taps'. That song of course was first written for the Daddy Bush crowd. Seemed highly/sadly appropriate for the Baby Bush crowd as well.

And that could've been the end but a moving Dylan song was next. So moving that i can't recall the name of it; very moving though. Started off on burgundy , soon moved on to the harder stuff...gravity fails...you must know the title; very moo-ving. This followed by a raunchy version of Farmer John which I was glad was not be the last song. The final song of the evening with Neil Young was a highly appropriate song for our High desert Nuevo Mexico town...and no, it wasn't Albuquerque, it was a fantastically long and dry version of Cortez the Killer

So yes, Meredith, I still love Neil Young. He more than anyone else in my book (including the much bally-hooed, Carlos Santana) is a Guitar Shaman .

Keep on Rockin' in the Free World!




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So much Chaos,
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