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Wednesday, November 26, 2003
Here's a link to a brand spanking new website by the one the only MJ himself::>M. Jackson's viewpoint

We've received many cards inspiring the gorging on turkey/etc.; this is the best::>Coolest Turkey!!

GEUDA SPRINGS, Kansas will soon be armed after a new law has been passed mandating that "every head of household" in Geuda Springs must own a gun. The ordinance will go into effect immediately after it's published in the local paper. It reads, "that in order to provide for emergency management of the city, every head of household residing in the city limits is required to maintain a firearm, together with ammunition." There are provisions in the law that say convicted felons and those with "religious beliefs against gun ownership" don't have to comply.
The town doesn't have a police department, so there's no one to enforce the ordinance.

Now that's some freshchaos to consider whilst turkey gorging.

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Monday, November 24, 2003

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Monday, Monday
Feeling a tad blown away today by yesterday's full solar eclipse, Dark of the moon and COLD temperatures. Though it is technically still 'autumn', WINTER has hit New Mexico by storm as they say. A bunch of blue arrows on the tv weatherman's screen showed the jet stream arrowing right through the heart of AlbuTurkey. Our high was around 40 degrees yesterday and the low was very low. Observing today what did and didn't make it through the first hard freeze. Happy too for a well insulated home.

Miss Melanie, our most freshly chaotic Schipperke,
brings in the Bird.

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Saturday, November 22, 2003
11/22/63-11/22/03:::> This just in re: JFK died this week, a million years ago...Get over it already !:
The whole deal with JFK is  that he would be 86 now if he had lived, but he never will be 86, he always be 46.(Sort of an older Jim Morison).
Plus der Amerikanisher Volk lost faith the government and possible most national institutions thereafter(11-22-63). Hence the belief in a government sponsored cover-up (the massive amount of classified info concerning the assassination,  the inept and inert Warren Commission, the willingness to belief whacko such as Jim Garrison, Vietnam, Watergate, Oliver Stone). Lost of innocence and lost of faith. Twas in true turning point. Things haven't been  the same since. That's what for a small start.

OK. Now, I get it. Thanks, my main man.

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Mass. Supreme Court Says Gay Marriage Ban Unconstitutional.
Warrant Reportedly Issued For Michael Jackson's Arrest
Scott Peterson Murder Case Moves To Trial
JFK died this week, a million years ago...Get over it already !

This just in: A traveler writes...There is a restaurant in Artesia, New Mexico called the Chaos Cafe which looked good, and it was packed up when we went through town yesterday. It looked like the kind of place that you wouldn't find in Artesia!

If you are a fan of Sex and the City on HBLOWS, you may be aware that there's a Club named Chaos in their fictional Manhattan. It is only mentioned in the earlier shows (pre-9-11-2001).
Now-a-daze no one would dream of naming ANYTHING with the word CHAOS as a part of their title. They'd just have to be out of their freaking minds . They'd have to be way out of the box. Way out of the mainstream. And if they live in the USA, they'd have to live somewhere way out WEST. Like Al-Bu-Turkey.

Perhaps much more important than all of the 'above' is this re-assuring news...
Echelon is perhaps the most powerful intelligence gathering organization in the world. Several credible reports suggest that this global electronic communications surveillance system presents an extreme threat to the privacy of people all over the world. According to these reports, ECHELON attempts to capture staggering volumes of satellite, microwave, cellular and fiber-optic traffic, including communications to and from North America. This vast quantity of voice and data communications are then processed through sophisticated filtering technologies.

This massive surveillance system apparently operates with little oversight. Moreover, the agencies that purportedly run ECHELON have provided few details as to the legal guidelines for the project. Because of this, there is no way of knowing if ECHELON is being used illegally to spy on private citizens.

This very website could mean a death by hanging for capnchaos; and, if you are reading this, which you surely must be doing ,well dudes and dudettes, THEY KNOW that you as NELSON says ...HA HA!!

No, I have not forgotten or tried to deny in my conciousness, Michael Jackson, but what can you really say about MJ that hasn't already been said and ignored for all these years...? Ditto, tv screen scenes of our PRESIDENT 'at table' with the Queen of England. George W. Bush is just sad. Truly, he is just a boy. Seems somewhat more comfortable with his own mother in Texas than with the Queen of England. You could get all worked up if it wasn't for the recently revealed fresh chaos of Prince Chazmo.

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Wednesday, November 19, 2003
There's just nothing going on in the world right now that's very fresh and chaotic...psyche!

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Sunday, November 16, 2003
Wal*Mart does Bunnies

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Thursday, November 13, 2003
Your FRESHCHAOS assignment for the week::> get to Best Buy and pick up the new concert box set called, Four Flicks by the Rollingstones for $ is a rather incredible collection of concerts in London, Paris, and New York. Mildly FANTASTIC and, of course, Freshly Chaotic.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2003
Here is a better picture of my father...

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Tuesday, November 11, 2003
He looks like a monkey in denial would today best describe :
a. W
b. Jack Hannah
c. Prince Chaz
d. all of the above

Today's answer is ....ceeee. Prince Chaz has firmly denied rumors without saying what those rumors are...Those darn Brits with their weapons of massive man servant lovers!!

Happy Days to you Veterans.

My father was a veteran of WWII; he loved haircuts.

After attending and playing football for the University of Notre Dame, he served as a United States Marine aviator in the Pacific Basin.

Here's to you , Dad...
Joseph F. Hartzer, Jr.

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Monday, November 10, 2003
Go Eagles...hooray for AQUILA'S/AQUILAE !!

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Saturday, November 08, 2003
This just in...

Does the Pope use a condom in the woods? by Jew Girl ...

In Judaism there are no saints, no persons who can intercede with God on anyone's behalf (as opposed to prophets who report the latest news from burning bushes), and nobody equivalent to the Pope. We like to keep it mystical and contradictory: God can not be known by mere humans and yet God walked with Adam ... that sort of thing. And while the Orthodox have many restrictions placed on sex, Jews in general are pretty laissez faire about contraception.

A couple weeks ago Pope John Paul II, now 25 years in the saddle, beatified Mother Teresa, the "Saint of the Gutters," saying, "... even in our days God inspires new models of sainthood. Some impose themselves for their radicalness, like that offered by Mother Teresa of Kolkata ..." (I don't understand that statement, but it did alert me to the fact that Calcutta is now Kolkata. Who knew?) Beatification is one step away from sainthood. Like many people, Catholic and non, I admired Mother Teresa's efforts to help the impoverished of India, taking on some of the "big boys" in the process. However, my admiration rubs up against some harsh things Mother Teresa said and tried to impose on people, Catholic and what have you. Two cases in point, as cited by Christopher Hitchens at Slate:

In 1996 she demanded in a referendum that divorce and remarriage be banned by a state constitution in Ireland. The referendum was defeated.

When she accepted the Nobel Peace Prize in 1979, Mother Teresa stated that abortion and contraception were the greatest threats to world peace. (Wow! Really? Wasn't 1979 the year Americans were taken hostage in Iran by ... uh, what do you call them ... oh yeah, terrorists?)

Likewise, I admire many of the good works of Pope John Paul II, particularly for his native Poland. But why can't compassion and realism temper his international statements? There are Catholic missions that allow for the use of condoms to prevent HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases even as they promote monogamy and abstinence. But the Pope, speaking from his unique position of authority, just can't seem to make this allowance. Statements have been made by the Vatican which assert that not only do condoms not prevent the transmission of HIV, but also that the use of condoms spreads HIV. (As Jon Stewart would say, "Whaaaaaa?") Don't be fooled by the scientific data presented to defend these statements, because the Vatican's conclusions are wrong! There's much more at the Nation, Is The Pope Crazy? by Katha Pollitt.

I once dated a gorgeous Chicano. It was 1980, the Age of Disco, and we were dance partners. He was very sexy and when he suggested we have sex, I considered putting out. That is, until he said no condom because he was Roman Catholic and using a condom was a sin! I said I was pretty sure fornication was a sin, too, and he said something like, "That's different." I have heard this attitude from non-Catholics as well and I just don't get it. What Jew Girl wants to know is why sperm is so darn sacred and ova (eggs), the other and equally important half of the reproductive equation, are not. Once a month, during her period, at least one egg exits a woman's body and is flushed down the toilet and otherwise disposed of as if it were something profane.

Thankfully, Jew Teen Girl didn't listen to the Pope on the issue of condoms. I chose not to risk pregnancy and a host of diseases I didn't even know about then. The relationship ended shortly thereafter.

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Compliments of Skippertown,
see a gallery of our ghoulish celebrations, including Miss Mellie's very bad hair week, the result of a crazed veterinarian technician in preparation for knee surgery. Punked out Mellie!

A Skipperish Halloween!

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Candidate Howard Dean To Skip Public Financing...Sources say presidential candidate Howard Dean has made a historic decision not to accept public financing for his campaign.

That news is almost as cool as the new's "search inside the book " concept and actualization. Or that new Australian band JET

AND ... more importantly, tonight a full moon lunar eclipse is happening!

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Friday, November 07, 2003
Control , Control , Control ... When are you going to realize that NOTHING can be controlled. We live in CHAOS. It is the center in everyone's life. Look around you. Everyone is struggling for control. And you know what it is they are trying to control - each and every one of them - FEAR. They are trying to control their fear.
Steve Martin in Grand Canyon

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Thursday, November 06, 2003
Write ins from our readers:
Regarding Michael Moore::>

Says one...I enjoyed reading your take on Michael Moore's UNM speech -- a good review.

Says another...I read your review of the Michael Moore talk with great interest this evening. In recent weeks, I have also become convinced that the "elephant is turning," albeit slowly. The Far Right is becoming shriller, and even less rationale in their political arguments. Rushs' fall from grace came at an opportune time to continue the verbal offensive against this radical bunch. Bush cannot expect any more free rides from criticism, and he is not handling the new reality very well.

A sign of desperation on the GOPs' part is deciding to make gay marriage and partial-birth abortion major issues for the next election. The arguments for reelecting Bush cannot be based on economic success, nor
the current foreign policy, so bring in the hot-button social issues that bring out the base core of the Bush voters.

I think what has always been so appealing about Moore is his down-to-earth approach in reaching out to the public. He has "been there," and has not forgotten what the downside of life is like. The observation about Canadians and guns makes a lot of sense. We as a nation were bought into the mythology of the "rugged individual" who made it on his own, with little, or no help. The Western Hero with the 6 gun is an image that is burned deeply into our psyche. That evolves into Dirty Harry, Rambo, and any number of cultural symbols that expressed their power, rage, and definition of justice through the gun. A man apart from others, rather than part of a community. I really do think that this leads to the social alienation that results in the
Columbine shooters, Tim McVeigh, along with the various snipers and shooters that have sprung up over the years.

I hope that Moore will continue to take on the powers-that-be, and
not lose his sense of outrage about our countrys future. It does'nt
appear that he will. Keep on speaking out, Michael!

Regarding Neighborhood CHAOS::>
One conventional, mainstream, and, yes, bourgeois response would be: why not move to a safer neighborhood?

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Wednesday, November 05, 2003
Sarah McLachlan's new cd is SOOOOOO mellow. A bit too mellow. The mellow song she played on Letterman is the opener and is ownly minisculey less mellow on the cd with band backup. By the way Dave and girlfriend, Regina Lasko, gave birth to a boy.

That almost famous surfer girl who got her arm bitten clean off over the weekend in Hawaii, has a brand new surfer who had her arm eaten website.

Saving lives and tending to dead people (see recent entries) is not something I would like to make a habit of. My emotions have been sapped and my needs to 'accomplish' something today have vanished into the misty mountain tops.

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Tuesday, November 04, 2003

If you've been living in a cave in China you still must be aware that TODAY Finding Nemo , the DVD, goes on sale.
What you may not know is that after about 3000 years, Sarah McLachlan has finally released a new cd called , Afterglow. She sang a fairly mellow song from the cd on David Letterman last night. Dave, by the way, was at the hospital (Paul Schaffer sat in for him) where his 'girlfriend' is delivering a baby...perhaps has, in fact by now, delivered him/her/it!

Here's a fun time waster ::> If you have a pc with Windows you can click RoadReadyTeensGame and play a free road game. If you have a Mac, tough teddy bears.

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More Monday Night/early Tuesday morning Chaos

A waking to gunshots again and a block away from our warm house...Oh God...Oh me...No one around anywhere; a suv with the door open, turning light blinking yellow on an empty street...and the one dead man by the sidewalk...another man held in our arms until paramedics arrive.

It has happened again and capnchaos and wifemate were the only ones on the street for quite some time at 4 a.m. this morning to aid a severely wounded man...Nothing to do for the other man. This, at the same house where Monday Night Chaos (see below) reported an incident witnessed Sunday morning. It has been strange to see the 5 a.m. Breaking News Stories on all three local networks get so much of their stories wrong.

Not much sleep since this 'awakening' event in our lives. My wife is a strong woman. She tended to the dead man killed apparently with a shotgun blast at point blank range while I helped a man named Tony with his arm helped on by his jacket. A lot of closed doors all around as no one knew (and at this time they still don't know ) where the shooters were. The news reports greeting breakfasters have three wild men with guns running through our neighborhood. Undoubtedly they were close by as Debra and I tried to help under the crystal starlight of what was totally too fresh chaos.

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Monday, November 03, 2003
MONDAY NIGHT CHAOS (episode 347a10slotc)
Hope your Days of the Dead, Samhains, Sukkots, ALL Souls' Days, ALL Saints' Days, ALL Hallows Days were all a Howling Scary SucceSS. Welcome to 2003's next to last month.

Scary Movies and stuff
Sunday morning I awoke to gunfire. In bare feet I walked to the corner to see what I could see. Sure enough there was some SCARY and strange chaos ... a little kid running around in his yard screaming a block up. Soon cop swarms appeared and I went back inside ... too SCARY and strange? Nah, I had to get my shoes. Ventured out again with shoes and a hat on my head to walk to the scene of SCARY and strange chaos where I took in a mind's eye photograph that has stuck with me since: a vision of this young, short-haired Hispanic teen completely naked on a stretcher, legs tightly wound together, his hand in gauze and real live action blood all over his face, neck, and chest, being hauled out the door of a darkened, early morning Sunday one story house into an ambulance that hesitated not at all in leaving the scene. A scoop and run, they call it.

There was no story on the tv set news nor the local fish wrap (no one wraps fish anymore, Dude! And this ain't Seattle.) I learned later he was born in 1988. After eight hours of surgery he made it. Maybe if he'd died it would've been newsworthy.

A scary way to start the day on Dia de los Muertos and one that has left me grateful for the simple little life I lead. November 1st is called Dia de los Angelitos and is a day to honor the death of children and babies. November 2nd is actually Dia de los Muertos, but that has come to be the name of the whole celebration. And it is a time for celebration. Seems pretty non-American, a celebration of those who have gone before us and who come back to say hello once a year, at least. We are so scared of death. The image of that boy on his stretcher so close to the hands of his fate remain glued in my mind's eye. Death is indeed a scary and strange thing. Some days though, death seems easier to me than the life my father lived for over twenty years past a debilitating stroke. Some days death seems an option for ending suffering. Had I been able to tell a vet to do away with my father's suffering as I would for a beloved dog or cat I would have. But that is illegal in the US of A where stock prices soar today as our soldiers are blown from the helicopter skies in a country we are no longer at war with.

Saw a sticker on a wall downtown this weekend: Iraq War I: blood for oil/Iraq War II: blood for votes ... SCARY!

Almost as scary as paying upwards of $8.75 for each ticket Saturday for a 'mid day' movie. Now they tell me there are no discounts on the weekend. $4.00 sodas make those rock concert $5.00 beers seem cheap. But the 'beauty part' is that my wife and I took in TWO movies for the price of one ... HAH!! Take that, you bastards! Yes, we stayed at the luxuriously appointed, still pretty Brand New Downtown Albuquerque Theater for two flicks ... Scary Movie 5000 and Mystic River. Crawling back to our car after sunset pretty blown away by, as a friend called it, "a cop movie with good actors," Mystic River. Way to go Clint Eastwood ... pretty SCARY movie. SCARIER STILL, as seen in Scary Movie 3, Pamela Anderson's so-called BREASTS.

That's our pumpkin from this year. It is now being eaten by the rabbits of BunnytownUSA. It was a nice big fat one picked from the vine romantically on a brisk October afternoon under blue skies and neon straight from the vines of Wal*Mart. Our crowd of candy gatherers was smaller this year. I have been reading that the crowds of candy gatherering kids are indeed down nationally and that the adult kids are drinking more, buying more costumery, and crashing cars and stuff much more than in years past. This is sad. But then again, Welcome to 2003's next to last month. And that trade symbol, WMT, is much higher now on our broker's list.

Scary TV ... when we finally subscribed to satellite and then added the luxury of HBLOWS, one of our living relatives commented that HBO just repeats everything and that she no longer subscribes (nor has an adequate Radio Shack antenna for FREE TV!!). I have found her to be correct about the repeats, but that's life. One thing that is scary to me, though, is how many times Crimson Tide or In Search of that big fat Red October thing have played. It leaves me to wonder about something that really scares me ... what happened to all of those Atomic Submarines and submariners? Who's paying their salaries and what are they going to do with all those cool missiles and stuff? Now that's almost as scary as the next terrorist threat ... California/[fill in with your state's name] Arsonists.

Ten folks lighting fires could really do a lot of damage. Ten folks doing a lot of stuff could do a lot of damage. Why aren't they out there doing it? Too busy watching SCARY TV would be my guess. This is the primo sports season of course. Arsonists are just too dang busy with football. And even FREE TV offered the Simpson's SCARY NIGHT Treehouse of Horror last night. Another score for creative genius that embraces both the dark and light sides of life and love.

More SCARINESS ... after a historic game last week The UNM Lobotomies are back to normal, losing to UNLV with HUGE, GAPING errors abounding. It was both SCARY and sad. This still could be the year of the Lobo ...

Forbes Magazine SCARY list of SCARY and DEAD rich folks includes in order:
Elvis Presley
Charles Schulz
John Lennon
Dale Earnhardt
Theodor "Dr. Seuss" Geisel
George Harrison
J.R.R. Tolkien
Bob Marley
Jimi Hendrix
Tupac Shakur
Marilyn Monroe
Jerry Garcia
Robert Ludlum

Things could be worse. I guess Jesus H. Christ didn't make the big bucks. But then HE is not dead like SATAN or Jim Morrison.

Welcome to 2003's next to last month.

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It takes less than a minute.......
Work this out as you read.
Don't cheat and read the bottom until you've worked through it!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like
to have dinner out. (try for more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (Just to be bold)
3. Add 5. (Just because)
4. Multiply it by 50 - I'll wait while you get the
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1753.... If
you haven't, add 1752...
6.. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number

The first digit of this was your original number

(How many times you want to eat out each week.)

The next two numbers are...YOUR AGE!


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So much Chaos,
So little time.

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