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Tuesday, January 30, 2001
Thirteen thousand dead. Now that's chaos of the worst kind. Eddie Izzard comments in a routine that we can deal with a death,a murder or even four or five deaths...but when you get to the bigger numbers, it becomes simply a hyperbolic-mumbo-jumbo-jet (The Captain's chaos not Eddie's) without an ability for real thought or feeling regarding the big D. It is also interesting that when say five people die in a burning building in Detroit, it is big news. When thousands perish in India or thousands riot in Jakarta, hmmm...oh well. USA...USA...!

Speaking of which, Big Daddy Earl has taken another fifteen minutes to write an article. This one about Bumperstickers .

Chaos Question of the Moment:
Am I the only person on the Planet who is getting a little bit tired of Sipowitz?
I mean Get Over It , already!

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Monday, January 29, 2001
I worry about the stupidist things on most days of my life.

At ten in the morning, I wonder if what I said to someone in yesterday's email might have ruined a friendship. At noon, I wonder if the car is going to start. At oh, 1:30 or so, I begin to think about that weird dream I had two nights ago. Around 3:00 in the afternoon, I consider going to Church for the first time in twenty years or so. At 4:37, I think that beer is way too fattening. 5:15 brings worry that this month's light bill will be quadruple what last month's was. At 6:33, I worry that one of those devastating earthquakes could happen where I live. God, what a day...

This morning brought a Reality Check. I was reminded that worry is useless. Worry sucks. It is just mind fodder to grow moldy, pale and bucket. You want some worry, I'll give ya something to worry about.

My good friend Victor was late for an appointment this morning. I grow worried; irate. Victor always says he'll be here at a certain time and he never arrives at the appointed hour. When he shows up today , he doesn't look good. Now a few months back, Victor was really late and I called his house only to learn that earlier he had cut off his thumb. Most of it anyway. Talk about a good excuse to be late for an appointed round.

This morning's excuse is even better. Victor has two sons and a daughter. His oldest son, Ivan, is a 'gifted and talented' high schooler. he is one of the nicest kids I know. Over the weekend for no apparent reason he was fine one minute and the next minute he just fainted and fell to the kitchen floor. He is a tall kid he took a fall so hard that he went into convulsions. He was taken to the hospital and later released with a few stitches to the back of his head and no particular reason given for his 'fainting spell'.

Soon after returning home , Ivan fainted a second time . Again hitting his head he remained unconcious this time for a full two minutes. Paramedics came and rushed him to the hospital. Today he can not raise himself up without massive dizziness. He now awaits 'the results of tests'. Whatever those results are, they can't be very good news.

I can worry all I want to about the next big 'disaster' but just walking around living and breathing seems good enough for now.

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Sunday, January 28, 2001
Interesting to see where FUTURE Super Bowls will be...Next year's is in New Orleans. My home town of Jacksonville, Florida is a future site. I hope the Jags recuperate before that happens...An estimated $400 million dollars is accrued by host cities.

All the super balls have been dropped...and they weren't so super...Cool copulating bunnies commercial...A snoozer game to end an odd season of super balls...Stand by for the XFL!!

That 'EyeVision' thing is pretty amazing.

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Saturday, January 27, 2001
Maybe it's a 'year of the snake' thing but I have been having powerful dreams of late. That and the wintry weather. Our fair city is Enchantingly dusted with snow and finally the blasts of wind that howled through my dreams has calmed. Now the only thing to be anxiously excited over is the big game tomorrow (which a lot of folks are saying isn't so big). I and many others risked life and limb driving around town collecting fatty, sugary 'game supplies'.

There is nothing quite like a Schipperke eating snow and bouncing about in a foot of white powder!

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Tuesday, January 23, 2001
On this, the last night of the anciently chaotic Year of the Dragon, there is a deep fog in Albuquerque.

Fog doesn't come often to the High desert. A snowfall earlier that melted left "moisture" ( well duh...)...and now fog exists.There are road signs in New Mexico that simply warn or possibly just mention that Gusty Winds May Exist Existential road signs are part of what I love about the Land of Enchantment.

Tonight folks, fog exists.
Here's the last of the Dragon's breath at our back gate.

Thanks to the pea-souper you couldn't see it anyway but also out tonight the Dark of the Moon Exists. The New Moon at dawn brings in the Year of the SNAKE.

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Monday, January 22, 2001

#1 Album of All Time!?

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Chaos NEWZ:The earth's atmosphere is warming faster than expected...and... President Bush has decided to block U.S. funds to international family-planning groups that offer abortion and abortion counseling. be alive and well in the aught ones. 2001 marches onward. Go Baby Go.

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Saturday, January 20, 2001
So you're done surfing but don't want to turn off the computer and face the real world?Try the Hollywood Stock Exchange for fun and fake profit/loss.
After you register you get about a zillion dollars to spend on Movies...Actors/Actresses...or on Music...Bands/Musicians.
Everyone has a favorite Movie or Movie Star or a favorite band...Go for it,dudes and dudettes...You've got nothing to lose except time spent away from the real world. And who needs that!

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An Army of One enters the White House today with slick wet roads under grey skies where, from now on, NO Email will exist!
W doesn't likes neither email nor television.
Newscasters say, "he is not a curious man."

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Thursday, January 18, 2001
Y2K+01 is here and rolling blackouts are a happening thing. We have just begun to see the ravages of snafus with our new millennial energy crisis. We whined so loudly about the cost of a gallon of gas ...Ha...that was nothing compared to this month's heating bill. Thank God we are all Dot Com millionaires so we can stay warm and cosy.

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Wednesday, January 17, 2001

Here be David Letterman, today's freshchaos hero when he was just a young prepster. I hope I am as peppy as Uncle Dave come this Friday, January 19th, when I will have lived and breathed on planet earth for over half a century.
That's a lot of heartbeats for this old guy.

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Tuesday, January 16, 2001
Random CHAOS:
"Ooh...nice butt"
"Honey cut it out!
We gotta go to Walmart."

Thrift Town: My kind of store. They have a website. You can't buy a thing at the site though.
Thrift Town is the kind of place where you have to feel the merchandise and BE THERE.
You just can't do everything on the web.

I hate the Vikings in the morning.
I hate the Vikings all day long...
doo doo daa daa
dee dee daa dee daa
Other than Dennis Green
I hate the Vikings all day long...

My new hero: Jason Sehorn...Wow.

XFL Cheerleaders: Coming soon and often.
"Unapologetically sexy sports chick with distinct personalities..."
says their coordinator.
A cheerleader coordinator...hmmm.

Next Science thingee: Geo Engineering. The Plan: Cool off the sun. Battleships fire stuff into space.
A zillion mini-mirrors launched in rockets too. Eggsellent.

Latest movie rental: The Thomas Crown Affair...let me just say that this movie has it all.
eggsellent surround sound, rich guy sailboats capsizing , surprising middles and endings after a slightly slow start. Pierce Brosnan ain't so swift as Bond; James Bond but he is aok here.
And that Rene job of acting for her yet and, my god, she has SPECTACULAR nipples.
Oogah Boogah!!

Chaos Empathetic Moment: Read about a kid with whom I have empathy...
This 9 year old boy was having a nightmare that his parents were being murdered.
While dreaming, he naturally tries to escape the murderers and jumps from his 3rd story window.
In his waking life now, he is in stable condition with multiple injuries.

Momentary Linkage:

Zipadeedoohdadays an overly HAPPY site!!!!!!!!!!

More GW humor Tons in fact. God, he's not even the PREZ yet

Momentary Lapse of Reason" Interesting journal concept from an author born in the 'Year of the Snake'

Gov. Gary Johnson's Playboy Magazine Interview

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Sunday, January 14, 2001
Another FRESHCHAOS prediction pans out...Ravenheads vs. Gigantics

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The Seven Lessons of CHAOS

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It's late in the second quarter of starlight outside
and hereby declares:
as the winning teams for Super Bowl XXXV !

And speaking of predictions, if you read the post for MONDAY, JANUARY 8th...
you were forewarned about the major San Salvadore earthquakes!!!
Say you saw it here...sad but true. That earthquake predictor guy is good.

Of course where

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Saturday, January 13, 2001
Well, the seasons change and at mid-winter footballs seem to sag. It would've been fun to see THE SAINTS or THE BUCS or I don't know some interesting team in the big time playoffs this weekend.

THE GIANTS have had a struggle. The (as my wife points out frequently) tight-pantsed RAIDERS kind of look good...and there are a zillion VIKING fanatics out there but, all in all, the Snooper Bowl is shaping up to be a snoozer.

Press the comment button and disagree if you like. Know that I'll be there with you watching the playoffs Sunday. Maybe tomorrow (ooh... I hear Scarlet O'Hara saying Tomorrow's another day), I'll be a bit more excited about this year's Super Bowl XXXV.

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Friday, January 12, 2001
D on the back of your car in Canada doesn't mean Deutschland anymore. It means you''re a convicted drunken driver.

CHAOS OLD newz: Linda Tripp...***...CHAOS NEW newz: Katherine Harris

Chaos Everywhere...rolling blackouts...snow...wind...waves...ahh to be a California Girl this winter. The 7th largest economy in the world is going to the dogs...who let the gas out?

You either like GRAPE or you hate it.

Join CHAOS in saluting the new I HATE ED campaign.
Mail your donations to:
I Hate Ed
P.O. BOX 25892
Albuquerque, NM 87125

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Thursday, January 11, 2001
For some great CHAOS visit the site that offers these bumperstickers...4 years is going to be a long strange trip with

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Check out the latest CHAOS from Big Daddy Earl. He calls it Fifteen Minutes.
We call it CHAOS...BigDaddyEarl's 15minutes

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If you missed the new TORRID TROPIC SEX SHOWon Fox Teevee...well, your life has more value than mine. GAUWLEE-GEE-WHIZ-BILLIE-BOB, it was so dumb.

Hats off to Blogger's new super smooth server but-tah...

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Wednesday, January 10, 2001
Coming right about now to a sky near you...check the sights at these eclipse sites...
Eclipse info/photographs
a Swiss Webcam
a Manila Webcam
Eclipse over Japan

Two other links of the moment...The Doors
Features New - thirty years ago - Doors...

Ain't it Cool dot com??a Big bearded guy makes it Big...

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Tropic Sex Fest on Fox TV's Temptation Island tonight. Oh yeah!!

Eleven Elkhart, Indiana firefighters had an extra l-o-n-g shift recently after eating brownies brought in by an unidentified woman. Ooh...the colors...those flames...make this shift stop...Man how many did you eat? Just one? What was in those things?

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Tuesday, January 09, 2001
Are all employees of electronics stores taught in three easy lessons how to make their customers feel like total idiots about dvd systems? Ok it's just me then. I have a nice setup for home theater surround sound with video tapes (yeah, they are as passe as vinyl records). I simply want to add a dvd player. Well, dudes it ain't easy. Cue Ringo: You know it don't come easy..."
Turns out the cool and groovy Dolby Pro Logic system I have is not in fact Digital. And to connect it with my tv and Teac Surround Sound receiver well, i'd have to plug in the vcr or the dvd but not both. And I'd have to buy this and then that and then this again...and in two years when the world goes over to HDTV ...I'd have to buy this and then that and then this again. Sweet. I'll stick with my vcr and video tapes awhile longer. Meanwhile Electronics Stores (even ULTIMATE ones) could learn to be a little kinder to their customers.

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Monday, January 08, 2001
Some links of interest as the NEW and even more God-ly Millennium unfolds...

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The Seismic Window of January 8-15, 2001, should clearly illustrate the earthquake-triggering mechanisms that I have
been espousing for more than 26 years.
James O. Berkland

ahhh...more earthquake predictions by Mr. B. over at on to your hats and scarves!
This weekend marked the end of the season for the New Orleans Saints. Blessed be, you curmudgeons of Mardi Gras.
And congrats to Coach of the Year Jim Haslett for an outstanding Saints' come marching in sort of year.

So do you prefer HONEY flu or TAMI flu?

Party on Garth. You're the man now,dog. Party on Wayne.

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Friday, January 05, 2001
Almost time to watch my new favorite tv show, CSI. Lots of gruesome bodily details and police action on the investigative end of the crime.
Albuquerque scored a national news story this week with a triple murder on the 17th floor of our local Marriott. The alleged murderer was shockingly drug free. And speaking of drugs, our Governor Gary is again in the news advocating lesser penalties for the occasional pot and or heroin user.

In breast newz...a family in London is giving her daughter free breast implants for her upcoming sweet 16 birthday. The joys of life in y2k+one!
For the latest on the rich guy sailboat race around the world, click this.

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So much Chaos,
So little time.

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